Mute
by XxSouthxParkxYaoixQueenxX
Summary: When in war, Ed's base gets bombed. Now, he's in the hospital, unresponsive. Al stays with him everyday, but he NEEDS to hear Ed's voice again. That becomes difficult when Al figures out that Ed had to pay a price to survive. Elricest. DISCONTINUED!
1. Intro

**Chapter 1:**

It was November 1, Monday. Precisely two weeks since Edward Elric was put in the hospital. The days just drag on without my short, hot-tempered older brother. Without him, the only thing I do is read alchemy books and working at a job I got at a café. And any other time I have on my hands, I'm at the hospital with Ed.

Right now I was standing outside of the hospital. My boots slowly being buried under the light snow falling. My hands were in gloves, shoved in my pockets to stay warm. A while I thought having a body would be better than not being able to feel anything. I was wrong. Feeling cold in winter and hot in summer sucks ass!

I looked up at the sky and stared at the gray clouds above. They always seemed to gray. Damn… My gloominess is fucking contagious.

Since Ed's been in the 'coma', I've become a bit of a jerk. Yeah, Alphonse Elric, the sweet innocent one of the family, a _jerk_! Impossible! But it's true. Maybe this is why Ed changed when Mom died…

"Alphonse!" I heard a yell from in front of me. I haven't notice that my eyes slid shut. I jerked them open and raised an eyebrow at the person. It was Winry, who was trudging through the snow while cursing. A day after Ed went into the coma, she had rented an apartment a few blocks away from our house. She said she wanted to help me in any way possible. But I didn't want help. I wanted Ed awake and responsive.

When she finally got up to me, she shoved her hand into her pockets and said. "Hey!"

"Hey." I said in the fake happy-go-lucky voice I use around people.

"What are you doing tonight? I was thinking we can go to that new sky resort outside of the city.

I knew what she was trying to do. Since last week, she's been trying to pull me away from Ed. She said it's unhealthy to stare at a barely living body every day and night. She wants me t move on and be happy. But I can't be happy without Ed.

I looked up at the sky. "Sorry. Can't. I have plans."

"What plans?"

"I have to stay with Ed. He might wake up soon."

From the corner of my eyes, I saw her clench her teeth. "Fine, Alphonse. If you want to be exactly like a bitter old man, _fine_. But don't come to me when you want to come out of your depression."

She stormed off.

"I'm not depressed!" I yelled at her as she crossed the street. I crossed my arms and walked angerly into the hospital.

"Welcome back, Alphonse." The woman at the front desk smiled. Her name was Jane…. I think. Maybe it was Mary. Usually I would remember, but I have been so uncoordinated lately.

"Can I see Ed?" I asked sweetly.

Her smile grew. "Sure, Al. Tell Ed I said hi."

I smiled and waved bye as I walked into the elevator. I hate it when she says that. It was to make me feel better, I knew that. She wanted me to believe with all my heart that Ed would be okay. Of course, I did believe that. But many people believed no one can survive a bomb blast that big…

The elevator dinged and I rushed out, practically running to Ed's room. _Maybe he changed. Maybe he's awake! Maybe he will finally be able to talk to me again!_

But once I reached his room and practically threw the door open, I realized he was in the same condition as before. I do this everyday. I get myself worked up with false words of enthusiasm, then get major disappointment when I see him. Maybe that's why I'm so bitter…

Anyway, I walked up to Ed's bed and stared down at him. Yep. Exactly the same as before. He was laying face up on the white hospital bed. His face was neutral, not showing discomfort or comfort. Just… emotionless. It was eerie.

They had him hooked up to so many machines, I knew when he woke up, he was throw himself at a doctor. The IV in his arm is enough to anger him, but he has about eight other machines beside him. The scratches and bruises on his skin were covered in think bandages, making it impossible for me to see the true damage behind it.

I sat in the usually seat and pushed the hair out of his face.

"Hey, Ed." I said in my old, regular voice. "It's me, Alphonse. I really miss you, big brother. Everybody does. I wish you would let me see those beautiful golden eyes of yours."

No response, as expected. I always talk to him. About problems, feeling, annoyances, and happy things that I come across.

"Work sucked today. I had so many customers that I thought I was going to die. Well, actually, the new intern slipped on spilt coffee and fell. I guess that made it worth getting out of bed. It totally made my day." I chuckled lightly.

I moved my fingers down his cheek, feeling his smooth skin. For someone who works in the military as much as Edward does, I thought his skin would be rough and scratchy. But his was smooth. Even smoother than mine, and I put lotion on and he doesn't.

"When will you wake up, Ed?" I whispered, mainly to myself. Well, actually all to myself, because he can't hear me. "I love you, you know. I want you to be back at home, eating stew and complaining about Mustang."

As always, he didn't even stir. I felt like crying. This made me sad, yet I come here everyday to comfort him. I don't want him to be alone, even if he's trapped in unconsciousness. No one deserves to be alone, even if they are like my brother.

"Hey, Alphonse." I heard a voice behind me.

I jumped and pulled my hand from Ed's cheek. I turned to find Ed's doctor, Dr. Itami, standing in the doorway. He was holding a clipboard, no doubt Ed's.

"Oh. Hi, Dr. Itami." I said, while blinking back the tears that found their way into my eyes.

He pushed his glasses farther up his nose and smirked. "Al, I told you before about talking to Ed. You're not helping yourself by hurting your confidence in his recovery."

"But-"

He walked up next to me and ruffled my hair. "if it makes you feel batter fine, but don't get into a habit. You'll scare people." He winked at me before scanning over Ed.

"Any changes?" he asked.

I sighed and shook my head. "No."

He smiled sadly at me. "Don't look so depressed, Al. Judging by this kids ability and hospital statues, he's been through a lot. Hell, he's only 17 and I saw him 5 times in a row."

I smiled back at him. "Thanks, but.. Do you really think he'll wake up."

He frowned and looked over the clipboard. "Actually, yes I do. He's not into a full coma yet. He's kind of just resting. Mr. Mustang told me the bomb that hit his base was pretty big. The body's natural reaction in to shut down and heal itself."

I nodded. "I understand."

"Good. Now, why don't you go get some rest? You have work, correct?"

I nodded slowly.

"Exactly! Run along, I'll call if there are any changes."

I sighed. I realize that Dr. Itami is trying to get me to leave so he can run tests on brother. But, I hate it when I have to leave. A part of me just dies. But I stood up anyway.

I squeezed Ed's hand lightly. "Bye, Ed."

Then, I turned and walked out the door, leaving my brother alone. And once again, just like when were little, I can't do anything to help him.


	2. Arguments

This part takes place **BEFORE **Ed is in the hospital... Enjoy!

**Chapter 2**

"And then Mustang dares to call me short! Can you believe that! Fucking Bastard! And another thing…" Here he goes again. We are eating stew at the dinner table, and he's rambling on about his day at work. He used the words 'fucking bastard' about eight times. Four in only one sentence.

I kind of just zoned out by now. When Ed gets in the mood to rant, he'll go for it. Maybe I'll finally stop asking 'how was your day at work.'

I chuckled meaninglessly and asked. "But did you get a mission?"

He stopped, the look on his face was a mixture between pain and sorrow. He scowled at his soup, refusing to look into my eyes. His grip on the spoon tightened.

"Ed?" I asked, cautiously. "What's wrong?"

He smiled up at me, his eyes closed. "Nothing! What makes you think that."

I knew this routine by now. I could right through that fake smile. He kept his eyes closed because he knows once he looks into mine, he'll tell me the truth.

"Ed, don't lie. You know I hate that. Just please tell me. It can't be that bad."

He sighed and looked into the bowl in front of him. "Look, Al. I don't want to talk about it."

"But Ed, talking is the perfect way t-"

"I know Al!" he yelled. "It's the perfect way to feel better! Maybe for _you, _but you damn well it only makes me feel worse."

I was shocked that he yelled at me, but more shocked that this was coming out now. I knew that this had to have a connection with what happened at Central.

"Ed, just tell me. I want to help."

He made the mistake of lifting his eyes to mine. I knew he regretted it when he sighed in defeat. He looked down and mumbled. "You're going to more angry than me."

"What happened? Did you lose your position in the military? If so, I won't be mad. I'll be glad. Fighting isn-"

"Al, you're rambling." He smirked, but it didn't reach his eyes.

I blushed and looked away. "Sorry, go ahead."

He sighed and paused. "I-I _was _sent on a mission…"

"Go on!" I said anxiously.

"…But, well- I, um…" He was stumbling over his words. That's never good when Ed does.

He sighed, closed his eyes tight and yelled. "I'm going to war!"

The air turned tense and there was no sound except for a car that rolled by outside. He kept his eyes close and his fist clenched. I stared at him in disbelief. My mouth was hanging open, eyes wide. Apparently, I dropped my spoon because wasn't in my fingers anymore.

I could hardly form words. My throat was numb. "You-You're what?" I whispered.

He swallowed and opened his eyes, still refusing to look at me. "They need some state alchemist down there and I was the most trustworthy. Mustang didn't give me a choice. Either go and help, or risk being court marshaled."

My brain was numb. I couldn't process what was happened. I felt cold. War… death… blood …DEATH… Ed… That's the only thing that ran through my mind. Not even sentences. Just word.

Suddenly, I was on my feet, slamming my fist against the table. I saw Ed flinch, but kept his head down as if he wished to be punished.

"Ed! Why the _fuck _didn't you tell me as soon as you got the news! This is fucking war, Ed! It's not a merry stroll in the park. You could die! What would I do then! What will I do without you by my side! I-I…"

I didn't realized I was crying until I saw a tear hit the table. I was shaking, hands balled into fist. I was angry, but sad. I think that was the first time I ever cursed at Ed. But right now, I wanted to fucking rip his head off. I felt betrayed. Like someone was stealing Ed from me.

Ed stood up and put an arm around me. "Al everything will be o-"

I pushed him away. "No! Don't even say that!"

Ed stumbled back, his back hitting the edge of the counte. I thought he would be shocked, maybe sad that I pushed him. But it was the compete opposite. He blew up.

"What's your deal!" He yelled, ten times higher and fiercer then I did. "There's no guarantee I will die. Don't you have fucking faith in me. I survived worse then war! I'll be fine!"

"There's no proof that you will come back in one piece. What if you get your other leg ripped off. What will you do then!"

"How the fuck will I lose my leg!" he yelled back.

"Bombs! What if a bomb goes off! You'll get blown to bits!"

"Then I'll be smart and quick about it and alchemize a barrier! I'm not stupid, Alphonse!"

"I never said you were!"

"That's not even the fucking point!"

"You're right, it isn't. Your life is a _much _better topic to argue about." I growled, heavy sarcasm dripping from my words.

"My life is not in danger."

"It's war. Everybody's life is in danger." I yelled. "Seriously, you need to think about what you're doing before you do it."

"Would you rather I be thrown in jail for disobeying a direct order!" he screamed.

"I'd rather you be stuck in cell then dead, Edward!"

"I'd rather die in battle then be stuck in a fucking stone cellar, Alphonse!"

"Fine! Then go die in battle like you wish! See if I give a fucking shit!" I yelled before I even know what I was saying.

The look on Ed's face made me want to die right there. His anger fell so fast, you'd think he was bipolar. Instead of a sneer, his face was twisted in emotional agony. He looked like he was going to cry.

But, as quickly as he shown his emotions, he blocked it with a neutral face. He nodded like he understood. Then, he turned and walked out of the room. After a few moments of silenced, I heard his door shut. It didn't even slam. It was gentle, as if he was happy.

The full realization of what I said hit me and I about cried. I technically told Ed that if he died, I wouldn't care.

"Shit." I whispered.

* * *

I managed to get the sleep at two this morning, which meant I had four hours to sleep. Now, it's six and I was feeling really shitty. As I made the coffee, I walked back to Ed's room. I knocked on the door quietly. Ed gets up five, so I knew he was awake.

"Ed? Can I come in?" I asked.

Silence.

"Listen, I'm sorry about last night. I was just shocked. I want you to know that I support you. Okay?"

No response.

I raised an eyebrow. "Ed?"

I slowly opened the door. The morning sun was the only light in the room. As I pushed the door open more, I realized that Ed wasn't on his bed.

"Ed!" I yelled, throwing the rest of the door open. "Edward!"

I ran out into the hallway and jerked open the bathroom. "Ed !"

Living room: no

Kitchen:no

Dining room: no

My room: no

Anywhere?: NO!

I ran back into his room, looking for any ideas of where he could be. Suddenly, something caught my eyes that I missed before. There was a folded piece of paper on his pillow. I blinked and walked over, flipping it open.

It read…

Alphonse, if you get this, I'm already on my way to the war. I'm sorry I didn't wake you. I can't stand seeing you cry. Besides, I know you must hate me now. I'm sorry for last night. You were right, I should have addressed you with this information sooner so you could see it in my perspective. I should have been more considerate. I'll be back, no matter what. When I get back, we'll both go Resembool and visit mom. I promise..

~E.

Tears welled up in my eyes as the note fell from my fingers. I was frozen for about ten seconds, then I ran out of his room. I nearly tripped on the couch as I tried to go through the living room. Finally, I got to the door.

I grabbed a coat and ran out into the cold air. As I raced to Central, I managed to get the coat on. It didn't help that I grabbed Ed's old red coat. oh, irony.

One I got to Central, I automatically went to Mustang office. He was sitting at his desk, as usual, with a stack of paperwork. Riza was surprising not in the room, probably getting coffee for Roy. He looked tired..

"Ah, Alphonse. What can I do for you?" He asked, looking up.

I paused. Why did I come here? Maybe its because I thought Ed would be here. But why would he. He left for war, leaving me behind. As always.

"Ed… Is he already gone?" I asked timidly.

Roy blinked. "Yeah. He left a little earlier. Why?"

I shook my head to say it didn't want to talk about it. I stumbled over and sat on the couch. How am I suppose to talk to him now? How am I suppose to say sorry? I should supported him about doing this. Not give him another reason to worry. If he dies, who's to say its not my fault.

I felt tears run down my cheek before I realized I was crying. I quickly wiped them away, remembering that Mustang was sitting no less than five feet away.

"Alphonse?" he asked.

I sniffed and looked up.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I-" I wiped my nose on Ed's jacket. "Can I call him?"

"Well, you can send him a letter, of course. But calling him is a bad idea."

I nodded. "I understand."

He smiled in sympathy and dug into his desk. He pulled out a piece of paper and a pan.

"Here. Just give it to me when your done. I'll deliver it with the rest of the letters to the soldiers."

I stood up and grabbed the paper. As soon as I sat back down, I wrote…

Edward,

I'm so sorry about that stupid fight. I should have at least tried to understood your situation. I guess that's why I'm not as strong as you. I want you to know that I support you 100%! And you better keep your promise! I want to see you back in one piece, or else…Remember, I love you!

~Al

* * *

It was three weeks since I sent the letter. I hope he got it. All I can do is hope he got and forgive me.

I was sitting in the living room, tea in my hands and reading an alchemy book that was lying in Ed's room. I brought out Ed's blanket from his bed and I'm wrapped in it tightly. It smells like Ed. Vanilla and oil. Sounds gross, but it was actually very heartwarming.

Suddenly, the phone rang, breaking my concentration. I sighed and yanked myself away from the couch.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Al. This is Mustang."

At first, I was excited. Maybe this meant Ed sent a letter back. But when I asked him, he said no.

"This is about Ed, though." he said. Was it just me or did his voice sound strained.

"What about him?" I asked, my heart beating faster.

"He.. Um. This isn't easy to say."

"Just say it! Please. What happened to my brother!" I practically yelled. Now I was paranoid.

He sighed. "The base he was staying at, was bombed."

My heart skipped a beep and my body went cold. "Wh-what!"

"It was a surprise attack. We don't know if he is alive or not."

"You don't know! What do you mean you don't know!" I yelled, tears leaking out my eyes. "Check! Send someone! Do anything. Please, just find my brother."

"I'm sorry, Al. But in all the chaos that's going on, we can't bring people down to that particular spot. We'll just have to wait."

"He'll be dead by then!" My voice cracked with emotion. I was shaking, but obviously not from the cold.

"As soon as I can, I'll send people there. In the mean time, get some rest. Don't worry. Goodbye." he said, and after all I heard was the dial tone.

The phone dropped, hitting the ground. I think it broke, but I didn't check. The only thing on my mind was the fact that there was a 85% chance that Ed was dead and never coming back.

I ran back to his empty room and flopped down on his bed. I dug my head into his pillow, damping it from my tears.

"Ed. You promise! You promised that you'd return! That we'd go to resembool together! Please! Ed!" I kept repeating his name as I snuggled his pillow, which spelt strongly of him.

There was only a little part of my brain that had some hope that he was alive. But the doubting part was bigger. No one actually survives a bomb blast. And even if they do, they are missing at least two limbs.

"This is all my fault." I whispered into the pillow. "I'm so sorry, Ed. I can't believe it. I should have went with you. I should have stopped being such a pussy! I'm sorry."

Eventually, I cried myself to sleep. His sweet scent all around me. I wish he was here. To comfort me. To talk to me. But I doubt that's ever going to happen again…

* * *

There is actually a Doujinshi thats called 'Mute.' But its way different. Its about Ed losing his hearing. He can lip-read with people to undertstand what the say, but Al is armor, so Ed can't lip-read with him.

You can read it at You should read it! It's better than what i summerize it to be. :D i'm a loser so... yeah.


	3. So close

***Takes place after chapter 1***

"Good morning, Alphonse." Melody, my manager, said to me when I walked into the café.

"Good morning, ma'am." I said as I slid out of my long overcoat.

"How's Ed today? Did you see him yet?"

I usually get to work at noon, since I visit Ed in the morning. But today, I got in early. The earlier I go to work, the more time tonight I get to see Ed.

"No, I didn't see him yet today. But, his doctor called and told me Ed might be waking up soon."

Mel blinked. "Really? Well that sure is some good news."

After I took this person's order, I said. "Yeah. Doctor said. 'He seems to be trying to pull himself out, but he can't exactly do that yet. He probably can hear and understand each word we're saying. But he just can't pull out until his body allows him.'"

"That's wonderful." she smiled as she patted my shoulder. "You better tell me when he wakes up. I want to meet this mysterious person. You talk about him like he's you wife."

I blushed. "I do not!"

She laughed. "Yeah, yeah. Just get back to work."

I frowned as she walked away. Then, I turned to the other person I work with.

"Do I really talk about him that much?" I asked him.

He shrugged and got back to pouring coffee. I sighed and turned to my customer.

"What'll it be, sir?" I asked politely.

I stumbled into my apartment. It was a very long day at work again. I cant believe so many people still go to cafés. I sighed and made myself a cup of tea.

Just as I was going to take a sip, the phone rang. I frowned and walked to it.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Alphonse. This is . I just called to say that Ed woke up."

I nearly dropped my cup of tea. "What!"

"Well, he just opened his eyes and went right back to sleep. I guess I can't call that waking up, but I just wanted you to know."

"What does that mean? Him waking up, I mean." I asked.

"Well, it means that he's fighting. That's good. Most people try not to wake up. But he's trying. It also means that he'll most likely wake up sooner than expected."

I smiled. "That's great! Can I come see him?"

"Of course." I heard him chuckle.

"Thank you! I'll be over in ten." I hung up and ran to the bedroom we used to share.

I yanked off my work clothes, nearly falling when I tried to get my pants off, and put on more casual clothes. Then, I grabbed my coat and ran to the hospital. The hospital wasn't that far away, so I could be there in about five minutes.

I barged into the hospital, running towards Ed's room.

"Hey." I said as I passed Jane…or Mary. I still can't remember her name.

"Hello." She called back as I rounded the corner.

I stopped running once I reached Ed's room. I stood in front of the door, trying to catch my breath. Once I seemed calmed, I walked in. My attention automatically went to Ed. And right away, I felt sad.

He was the same. The same emotionless face that glowed in the florescent lights. The same steady rising and falling of his chest. And the same closed eyes lids that hid his golden eyes.

I sighed and carefully sat in the chair, making sure not to make any noise. I don't know why it matter to be quiet, but I do it every time. The one thing I should be doing is making noise to try and wake him up. But I can't bring myself to try and do that.

"Ed." I whispered as I reached for his hand.

Right when I put my hand against his, his hand slowly moved around mine.

I gasped and pulled my hand back, as I jumped to my feet. "Ed?"

His hand moved weakly, as if searching where mine had went. I blinked and reached out again. I weaved our hands together.

"Ed?" I asked again, hoping he would respond.

I stared intensively at his face, looking for any signs that he was waking up. I found none. It was just his usual sleeping face. I sighed sadly and sat down in the chair, gripping his hand harder.

"Why won't you wake up?" I asked, closing my eyes.

I bowed my head and felt tears rise in my eyes. "Please, Ed. Please, wake up!"

Ed's hand gripped mine softly.

I blinked and looked up. Ed's eyes slowly opened, staring up at the ceiling. I was to shocked to say anything. His golden eyes were unfocused, yet they stayed on the ceiling. About a second of staring at the ceiling, the fell close again.

"Ed?" I whispered, leaping up. "Ed! Ed get up! Don't go back to sleep, please!"

He stayed unresponsive. Tears slid down my cheek. "Wake up! Ed, please wake up!"

His face was the same as before, unexpressive and blank. His hand went limp, falling from my hand. I wanted to scream. He was close to waking up. So close! But he went right back under.

I fell back into the chair, putting my face into my hands. Seeing him being so close to waking up was worse than hearing the doctor say it. But I'm glad that I seen it up front. At least I know that soon he will wake up.

At least I know that we'll be able to talk and laugh again...


	4. Memory

I walked down the sidewalk, making my way to the apartment. Earlier that day, Ed's eyes opened. I can't get that image out of my head. It gave me hope, but also disappointment. I'm disappointed that he fell back asleep, yet hopeful because it meant he'll wake up sooner than expected.

Once I got into the apartment, I threw myself into my bed. When we first got the apartment, we shared this bedroom. We also had to share the same bed. I didn't mind it, but Ed thought he was smothering me. It was when I got my body back, so I understood why he would think that. But I didn't mind. Actually, I thought it was a great idea to share a room.

But somehow Ed got it in his mind that I was annoyed with his behavior. So, he cleaned out room we use for storage, and made that his bedroom. I remember that day perfectly…

* * *

"_Ed!" I called as I walked into the house from the store. "Where are you?"_

"_In here!" I heard him call from down the hall._

_I blinked. "Why are you in the storage room?"_

_I walked down the hallway, groceries still in my arms. Once I got to the room, I almost dropped the bag at the mess._

"_Ed? What are you doing?" I asked cautiously._

_He was in the middle of the room, covered in paint and dust. There was paintbrush in his hand, close to the ground. And the walls of the storage room were paint blood red._

_He smiled up at me. "Isn't it obvious. This is my room!"_

_I sighed. "You room?" After a second of thinking about it, I blinked. "Wait, you already have a room."_

"_Well yeah, technically I do. But, __**our **__room will now become __**your **__room. I don't want you to feel overwhelmed."_

"_I don't feel over whelming! You can stay with me in __**our **__room. Okay?" I smiled hopefully._

"_Nope! I already made up my mind! Besides, I already painted and cleaned out the room."_

"_This seems a little small, doesn't it." S_mall room for a small person, I guess, _I thought in my head._

_He frowned and looked around. "I don't think so."_

Of course you don't.

"_Well, if you don't want to be in my room, then okay. I guess I can't force you to share the room." I smiled, although I was sad that he left. I loved sleeping with Ed at night in the same bed. It gave me a sense of security. And I was happy._

"_Great! Now if I could only find a bed…" He mumbled._

_I blinked in confusion. "Why not just alchemize one?"_

"_I was thinking about that. But, there's nothing I can use it with. I would have to get wood."_

"_Mrs. Beshe sells wood. She lives two doors down from us."_

_He scratched his head. "Too expense. It would be easier to just buy a bed. I'll get one tomorrow."_

"_You can sleep in my room for tonight." I suggested._

_He chuckled. "Nah. I can handle sleeping on the floor! Thanks for the offer though."_

Looks like he's not changing his mind_**. **__I thought dryly._

"_All right, Ed." I sighed. "just don't make a mess with the paint."_

"_Yeah, yeah." He grumbled, tossing the paint brush into the paint can. He smiled. "By the way, what's for dinner. I'm starving."_

_

* * *

_

_That night, I laid in the bed alone. Ed took his pillow and went into his bedroom. He said I should keep the blankets for tonight. Then, he moved my pillow until it was in the middle of the bed, smiled, and left the room._

_Right when he left, I yanked my pillow to the right side, the side I always slept on, and curled into a ball. My back was to Ed's spot. I tried to pretend he was there. But there was no heat that told me that his body was there._

_

* * *

_

_I woke up some time in the middle of the night, sweating from my first nightmare since I got my body back. I pulled the covers around me and turned to Ed…. But he wasn't there. He was in his new room, probably freezing without a blanket._

_I frowned and yanked myself out of bed. I walked out of the room, the warm blanket covering my body. Once I reached Ed's room, I quietly opened the door. _

_Ed was sleeping in the middle of the room, his light snores echoing off the empty walls. He was laying on the black, paint stained carpet with only a pillow. The moonlight coming in from the window glowed against his skin, allowing me to see the visible goose bumps._

_I walked over to him, after closing the door lightly, and threw the blanket over his shivering body. After I saw that he was warming up, I sat down beside him. I smiled at the peacefulness that he only shows in his dreams. _

_I brushed the stray hair off his cheek and tucked it behind his ears. Ed shivered from my cold hand and curled into a ball, yet still facing me._

"_Al..phonse." He whispered._

_I gasped quietly, but as soon as I saw that he was still asleep, I sighed._

"_I'm here, Ed." I whispered, aware that he couldn't hear me. _

_My hand stayed rested on his cheek, which was now warmer because of the heat from the blanket. I stayed like this for a long time, until I heard the alarm clock in my bedroom go off. Ed didn't stir, but I noticeable jumped._

_I jumped to my feet and ran into my bed room. Then, I hurrily turned off the alarm clock. It was five o'clock. I usually wake up this early to make breakfast while reading alchemy book. Today, I just wanted to stare at Ed's sleeping face, like I used to do when I was in the armor. But I knew I couldn't do that. Knowing Ed, he would throw a fit that I was awake watching him instead of sleeping._

_I sighed and headed towards the kithen, stealing a glance at Ed before grabbing a book and making breakfast._

_

* * *

_

Just thinking about that made me unconsciously walk to Ed's room. I quietly walked in, forgetting everything except the memory. I looked automatically looked at the floor. But instead of Ed, I found a bunch of books and clothes spread everywhere.

I blinked and walked to his bed. The bed smelt like Ed, his unusual mixture of vanilla and oil. I flopped down on it, curling up in his blankets.

"Ed…" I whispered.

Maybe tonight.. just maybe.. I could forget all that's happened and pretend that Ed's still beside me.


	5. Discouraged

I silently poked my head into the hospital door, sighing when I saw that Ed was the same. I walked the rest of the way into the hospital room.

"I got to get to work, Ed, so I can only stay here for a little bit. Okay?" I said down to him, smiling slightly.

My voice sounded hopeful when I spoke to Ed, but in my thoughts, it was a different story. _This is getting old. _I ran my fingers through his soft hair. _I'm patient. But when it comes to Ed being hurt, I can't sit still knowing that he's in pain._

I looked at his face. _Well, it doesn't look like he's in pain. Actually he looks…. _I blinked and narrowed my eyes. _Peaceful. He looks peaceful today. "_Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I asked aloud.

"Is what a good thing or a bad thing?" A deep voice said behind me.

I flinched and spun around. Dr. Itami smiled.

"A little jumpy today, aren't we, Alphonse." He said.

I laughed nervously. "Uh...Yeah."

"My question still remains, Al."

"Oh, um. Ed, he looks more serene today, doesn't he?" I stepped aside so the doctor could look at him.

Dr. Itami blinked and walked up to my brother. He scanned Ed's features and pursed his lips. "He does seem more...calm than usual."

"Exactly. And I was wondering if it was a bad thing or a good thing."

He smiled at me. "How about I run some tests? That sound good to you?"

I smiled back. "Yes, thank you!"

I looked at my watch. 11:30. "Crap. Have to get to work. Call me about Ed's condition, please."

"Of course. Bye."

I ran out the room, waving back at him. "Goodbye!"

* * *

"Hey, did you hear about that Fullmetal kid?" A customer said behind me.

Right now, I was making coffee for this guy and his friend. I have an hour left until I can see Ed.

I blinked. My back was facing the man, so I moved my head so I could hear him.

"Yeah, I did." His friend said. "I heard he was bombed and now been unconscious for… um.."

"Was it two weeks… three weeks? I don't remember, but isn't that strange." He said.

_Strange?_ I asked in my head. His friend read my mind. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I heard from Charlie down the street that the bomb was big enough to wipe out about half of Central. Everybody, _except _him, died. Doesn't that sound suspicious?" He explained.

"Yeah, I guess. But we're talking about the Fullmetal alchemist. If he was strong enough to become a state alchemist as young as he is, I think he could survive a bomb blast." She said in a matter-of-fact voice.

"Sure, but think past that. He is still only 18. No matter how strong he is, do you really think he could have came out _without _missing another limb."

"Does it really matter?"

"No, I guess not." He paused. "Hey, how about those gas prices..."

_That does sound suspicious. I mean, Ed only has a few parts of his body that are not bruised, but he should have been dead. I mean- No, I can't let anything discourage me! He _will_ survive. I know he will! Right?_

"Uh, Alphonse?" Someone said beside me.

I blinked and looked up. Mel smirked at me. "You have been staring at the coffee machine for five minutes. People at waiting."

I blushed. "Oh, sorry! I was just…never mind." I poured the coffee and shoved the cups into the man's hands. "Sorry for the wait! Good day!"

He gave me a confused look, but shrugged and gave her friend that coffee. She smiled and gave me the money. I don't remember where I out the money actually. I think I out it on the counter. But the only thing I could think of, as I watched the two get a table, is why Ed was alive.

* * *

"Burr!" I exclaimed as I walked into the hospital, shaking the snow out of my hair.

"Hello, Alphonse!" Jane/Mary said.

"Good afternoon." I smiled brightly at her, ever though I felt really miserable.

"When did it start snowing outside?" She asked, tilting her head to the side.

"I don't know. It was already coming down when I left work."

"Oh, well, never mind me. Go see Ed."

I smiled. That's exactly what I wanted. "Thanks."

"Say hi for me!" She smiled back.

I walked into the elevator, saying 'goodbye' over my shoulder. Once I got into Ed's room, I sat down and smiled.

"I have an alchemy book today, Ed." I said softly. "Now wait, I think this is an alkahestry book. I just grabbed it off the shelf of the library to be honest."

I stared at him for a moment, until sighing and opening the book.

* * *

"Alphonse? Al, wake up?" Someone said, rocking me back and forth.

"Brother?" I asked, hopefully.

I opened my eyes slowly. But Ed wasn't standing above me. "No, Al. It's Dr. Itami."

I blinked and looked around. I was in the hospital room, slouched on the chair. The alkahestry book was laying on my stomach. I sat up straighter.

"How careless of me to fall asleep." I stated, runningmy fingers through my hair.

Dr. Itami chuckled. "It's only seven o'clock. So, don't worry. I walked by the door and… well, I found you."

I smiled, apologetically. "I'm sorry."

"No, no. It doesn't matter. Jamey said you looked tired when you came in."

"Jamey?" I asked.

"The front desk lady." He said, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh! Sorry, I guess I'm still out of it." I covered up my mistake. _So that's her name. Where did I get Jane and Mary at?_

"Well, I'll leave you guys alone. I have a patient that needs me." He turned to leave.

"Wait!" I called.

He looked back at me. "Yes?"

I opened my mouth to ask, but then closed it once more. _I shouldn't take up his time. He has a patient to look at. _"Never mind. Have a good day!"

He smiled. "You too, Alphonse. Bye."

He walked out, closing the door behind him. I looked back at Ed. _Is it strange, Dr. Itami, that Ed survived? _

I sighed and grabbed Ed's hand. "I have to go soon. Tomorrow I need to go to work early."

His face was, again, peaceful. Oh yeah, I forgot to ask Dr. Itami about that. _Maybe I should go do that before I forget again. _I stood up to leave, but right when I turned around, I felt something clutch my jacket sleeve.

I blinked and looked back at my hand, which was now frozen in midair. I gasped as I found what had my jacket. Ed's finger were gripping the end of sleeve tightly. It wasn't even weak like how he held my hand last time. It was powerful.

"Ed?" I looked to his calm face. "Can you hear me?"

Suddenly, his lips moved. He mouthed one word. 'Alphonse.' Then, his eyes slowly opened. I was just like yesterday, except once his eyes opened, they didn't stare at the ceiling.

His golden eyes slowly moved and focused on me. I was so shocked that I couldn't move. I stared down at him, eyes wide. I think I started shaking, but I don't know. The only thing I did know was that Ed was now smiling at me.

"Ed?" I asked, softly. I couldn't believe my own eyes, Was Ed...awake?

His smiled grew bigger once I said his name.

"Ed!" I screamed, jumping onto the bed and yanked him into a hug.

I knew he was shocked because of the way he tensed. But then he lifted his automail hand slowly and put on my head, ruffling my hair. I smiled as tear ran from my eyes, damping his light blue hospital shirt.

After a mintue, he frantically patted my back, signaling that he couldn't breathe. I pulled away. "I'm sorry!"

He took a few deep breaths before opening his eyes and smirking. I propped him up on the pillows and got off the bed.

"Stay right there. I'll go get Dr. Itami. Okay, Ed?" I said slowly, tear still on my cheeks.

He rolled his eyes, but nodded.

"Great! I'll be back." I said, running out of the room in search of Dr. Itami.

"Dr. Itami! Dr. Itami!" I yelled down the hall, dodging people the best I could.

I searched the whole floor, until I gave up and went to the front desk. "Jamey!"

She blinked and looked up. I stopped in front of her and tried to catch my breath. "Breathe, Alphonse. What's the matter?"

"I need Dr. Itami! Now!"

"Uh, I think he's in the break room. Why?" She said.

But I was already running. "Thanks!" I called as I ran down the hallway.

"Break room, break room." I mumbled as I searched the doors i ran by. "Ah! Break room!"

I pushed the door open. Dr. Itami blinked. "Alphonse?" He was drinking coffee, leaning against the counter. I grabbed his hand and tugged, signaling I want him to follow. He did, and when I started running, he almost dropped his mug.

"Whoa, Al. What's the matter?"

"It's Ed! He woke up! He-He smiled and looked at me! He's awake!" I started crying again as I ran.

I dragged him into Ed's room and waved my hand in Ed's direction. Dr. Itami raised an eyebrow. _What does that mean? _I looked back at Ed. His eyes were closed, his mouth in a straight line.

_Did I imagine the whole thing?_

"Ed?" I asked, walking to his bed.

His eyes scrunched, then opened gently. Once he saw me, he smiled. I smiled back. _I didn't imagine it! He's really awake! _

"Well, well, well. Good afternoon, Ed." Dr. Itami smiled. "How are you on this fine evening?"

Ed shrugged.

"Well, I guess that's good. Are you in any pain?"

He shook his head.

"Are you tired?"

He nodded.

I blinked. Dr. Itami asked Ed more questions. And Ed either shrugged, nodded, or shook his head. I don't think Dr. Itami noticed, but I did.

"Ed?" He looked at me. "Why won't you talk?"

He blinked, then looked down sadly.

"Well, Ed?" I asked.

I looked over at Dr. Itami, then motioned for him to come here. The confused doctor blinked and walked over to Ed.

"Yes?"

Ed reached up and grabbed a pen out of Dr. Itami's shirt pocket. He held it in his right hand and held up his left wrist. He write on his skin quickly, then showed it to us.

'I can't talk.'


	6. Silent Laughing Never Sounded So Good

I_felt like I couldn't breathe. "Wh-What do you mean you can't talk?"_

_He gave me that 'what do you think?' look. I trembled._

_"I'll take some tests." Dr. Itami stated, breaking the awkward silence in the air. "Why don't you go wait in the waiting room, Alphonse."_

_I swallowed roughly and nodded. "Okay."_

_

* * *

_That was about a half an hour ago. And i sat here, worried out of my mind. I was just about to go up to the room and slam the door down, when Dr. Itami approached me, clip board in his hand. I jumped to my feet.

"Well? What's wrong with him?" I asked frantically.

He ran his hand through his thinning gray hair. "Well, this might sound crazy, but I ran all the tests. And it would seem that Edward has no vocal chords."

I stared at him for at least five minutes, trying to wrap my head around what he said. _What? No vocal chords! How can he have no vocal chords! It was just a bomb blast. _My heart skipped a beat. _Unless…_

"I want to keep him here for another day. I can clean his wounds and watch his process. Then, I'll deicide if he can stay or go. You should go get some sleep."

He was about to walk away. I grabbed his wrist.

"Wait." He looked back at me. "Can I stay here tonight?"

"You mean, in his room?" He asked.

I nodded quickly.

"Don't you have work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, but Ed woke. I think they'll understand if I take off." I smiled sadly.

He sighed. "Fine. But you need to let him sleep for tonight. He's very tired. Tomorrow, you guys can catch up."

"Thanks!" I exclaimed, passing him and running to the elevator.

When I walked into his room, Ed opened his eyes slowly and looked at me. He looked very tired. His eyes dropped a little and his smile looked strained.

Before I knew it, tears were running down my face. I sniffed and tried to wipe my tears with my jacket. Ed blinked, his smile falling. He held his arms open, as if getting ready to hug someone. I bit my lip, trying to keep the new tears from coming out. But it was hopeless.

I ran into his arms, snuggling beside him, and cried my eyes out. "You scared me! Don't ever do that again! I was so lost without you awake. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Brother."

I kept repeating that I was sorry until I ran out of tears. I sniffed and looked up at Ed's face. He smiled and tugged at my jacket. I understood.

I shrugged off my jacket and threw it off the chair. My shoes also came off. Then, I crawled under the covers and snuggled next to Ed. He laid down and held me closer. Unshed tears were still laying in my eyes. He gently wiped them away and kissed my forehead.

I closed my eyes, falling into the darkness with Ed's strong arms wrapped around my body.

* * *

I woke to the sound of flipping pages and the smell of metal. I scrunched my eyes and opened them slowly. Then, I looked around.

Ed was propped up against the pillow behind him, flipping though the alkahestry I had dropped on the floor yesterday. I was leaning against his automail arm, my arms holding it tightly against my chest.

"Ed?" I asked.

He blinked and looked down. When he saw that I was awake, he smiled. 'Morning.' He mouthed.

"Good morning." I replied, slightly feeling sad that he couldn't talk.

I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I looked down at my clothes. "Oh no. It's going to take awhile to get these wrinkles out."

I felt the bed slightly shake. I blinked and looked back at Ed. His shoulders were shaking and his mouth was open in a huge smile. He was silent laughing.

Seeing this made me want to cry again. He can't even laugh! Although, that was a given. He has no vocal chords, so he can't speak, laugh, hum, sing, yell… he can't do _anything. _He pulled Dr. Itami's pen from underneath the pillow. With a huge smile on his face, he wrote on his wrist again.

'Same old Alphonse.' It read, under the 'I can't talk' from last night. He crossed both out, then put the pen under the pillow once again. I smiled.

"I guess." I said sadly.

His smiled faded quickly. Right when he was about to ask what's wrong, the door opened. Dr. Itami came in, with a tray. On the tray was a blue bowl, filled with steaming liquid.

"Here you go, Edward! Steaming hot chicken broth!" He exclaimed, laying the tray on Ed's lap carefully.

Ed raised an eyebrow and looked back at the doctor.

'For _breakfast_.' He mouthed, disbelief in his eyes.

"Well, of course. There is no other liquids we have that you can drink. Except milk. Would you like that?" Dr. Itami smirked.

Ed stuck his tongue out, symbolizing 'barf.'

He laughed. "Good. Now eat."

Dr. Itami turned to leave. 'Wait.' Ed tried to say, but nothing came out. So instead, he clapped his hands loudly. The doctor looked back, raising an eyebrow. Ed pretending he was writing on paper by laying his hand flat and holding an imaginary pencil in his hand. Then, he moved the "pencil" across his hand.

'Notebook?' he mouthed.

"Sure, I can get you a notebook." Dr. Itami confirmed.

Then, he walked out the door, leaving us alone. Ed smirked down at the broth and slurped up the liquid. I blinked, thinking about how he could be moving when he has injuries all over his body. He looked up and saw the curious look on my face. Ed misread my curiosity and he pulled the spoon up, facing me. Then, he held open his mouth, as if trying to feed a child.

I blushed. "No, thank you."

He smirked and shrugged as if to say, 'more for me.' Then, he went back to eating.

After a moment of silence, I asked. "Can I ask you some questions?"

He stopped in mid-slurp. Then, he looked down and nodded.

"Are you in any pain? And don't lie like you did to the doctor." I said, staring at him darkly.

He half-smiled and mouthed. 'You noticed?' Or something along those lines.

"Yes." I answered.

Ed sighed. He looked up at me and nodded.

"Where?" I asked.

He pointed to his ribs and then brought his hand up to his throat.

"Okay. And, um, are you…mentally okay?" I asked hesitantly.

He mute laughed as he nodded. I smiled, but then frowned. "How many people did you kill?"

His face became serious and he shook his head.

"No?" I asked. "No, you didn't kill anyone. Or no, you don't want to talk about it?

He held up one finger. I smiled. He didn't kill anyone. Good. "And my last question, did you die?"

His eyes widened and he looked up at me. I narrowed my eyes, searching for some kind of clues of what his answer will be. But just as he opened his mouth, the door slammed open.

"I have the notebook you wanted Edward." Dr, Itami said.

I stood up and took the notebook. "Thanks."

He smiled and said goodbye. After he left, I looked back at Ed. He was staring down at his broth, his hands clenched.

I sighed and took the broth away. Then, I threw the notebook onto the tray on his lap. I reached under the pillow and replaced the spoon in his hand with the pen.

"Ed, please. I want you to write down everything that happened. Every detail, every thought and every feeling. I want to know what happened. AndI can tell when you're lying, so don't even try." I commanded.

He looked up to me. We stared at each other for awhile until he looked back down at the notebook. I sat on my usual chair, waiting for him to respond to my command.

He began to write…


	7. You lose things in War

Ed's P.O.V

***If you haven't seen the 2nd episode in Fma: Brotherhood, I suggest you do before reading this. If not, you won't understand what I'm talking about in this chapter.**

"Let's go, ladies! We don't all day. Get your asses in gear!" A general said up ahead, directing people on the train.

As I waited for the line to pick up speed, I looked back at the direction of our apartment. _I'm such a pussy. I wrote a goodbye letter. A fucking _letter. _Oh well. I'll be back. Then, I can be a fucking man and tell Alphonse sorry._

"Come on, pipsqueak. You're holding up the line." The General said, obviously referring to me.

I realized that while I was looking back, I stopped walking. Now, I was the only one on the platform.

"Who are you calling a pipsqueak!" I yelled, running to the train's door.

It was morning, day…uh….21. Three weeks, was it? I have no idea.

My army comrade, Allen and I were in the trenches. We had to sit there until further instructions were given from our General, who I think I saw covered in blood just a few minutes ago. It might have been him. There were so many dead bodies around this place that it made crowded street seem empty.

"This is pointless!" I complained quietly, trying not to draw attention to us. "What the hell are we waiting here for! I need to do something or I'm going to freeze the fucking ground!"

Allen readjusted his gun. "I don't know but I'm about to just jump up and start shooting!"

"Fuck yeah!" I chuckled. "Sounds like something I can do!"

He smirked down at me. "Go ahead, Daredevil."

He gave me that name when we first met. We were eating food together when some other soldiers started calling me a midget! So, I did the only natural thing I could do. I beat the living shit out of them. In the end, Allen had to pull me away. He laughed.

"You sure are a risk-taker my irate young comrade." He said. "You new nickname is going to be, Daredevil. 'Kay, shorty."

He was lucky I needed him to be in tip-top condition of he would have ended up as the other soldiers.

"I would if I didn't know I'd be dead before I even clapped my hands." I responded. "'Sides, my little brother would kill me if he found out I did something that reckless."

"Alphonse, right?" He asked.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

He smirked. "You talk in your sleep."

I blushed. "Shut up!"

"Elric!" I heard a deep voice behind me.

"What!" I growled angrily, turning my head.

The General sat beside me, holding his arm tightly. It looks like he had been shot in the shoulder. I rolled my eyes. "Some General you are. Got a job for us?"

He scowled at me. "You better hold your tongue, Elric. And no, I don't have a job for you. But, I have a letter."

"A letter?" I asked.

He nodded and pulled out an envelope from his uniform. "It's from a young lad named Alphonse"

"Al!" I almost yelled, snatching the letter from his hand. "Give me that!"

I quickly ripped it open, ignoring the General's glare. I unfolded the paper inside. It read…

Edward,

I'm so sorry about that stupid fight. I should have at least tried to understood your situation. I guess that's why I'm not as strong as you. I want you to know that I support you 100%! And you better keep your promise! I want to see you back in one piece, or else…Remember, I love you!

~Al

I sighed, my hand lingering on his name, written with care. Not like my sloppy handwriting. His was perfect. _He _was perfect.

"What's it say?" Allen joked, trying to grab the paper.

"Get you own brother, Allen!" I protested, hiding it in my uniform(Yes, I had to wear a stupid uniform).

"Anyway, Elric, I have a job for you." The General said.

"I thought you said you _didn't _have a job for me." I growled.

"Well, now I do. Or would you rather sit here on your ass like a useless old lady?"

"As long as Allen can come."

Allen blinked. "Wait, what?"

"Fine. Now here's what I want you to do. This was originally my job, but I going to get my shoulder to stop bleeding. In the mean time, I want you to go back to the base and grab forty men. Bring them to me."

"Really, that's all I have to do. That's lame!"

"Better than being pathetic curled up in a trench." he snapped.

I sighed. "Fine, I'll do it. Come on, Allen."

We ran through the trench, dodging bodies and debris from bombs outside.

"What if one of those bombs hit us?" Allen asked over the roar of the plane overhead.

"Well, I told my baby brother that if I was bombed, I'd use alchemy to save myself. So, that's our plan."

"That's the most reckless and dangerous thing to do when bombed, Ed"

I smirked back at him. "I have to live up to my nickname, don't I."

"You're fucking insane." He growled. Suddenly, the ground shook underneath me and the huge _boom _of the bomb filled my ears. I ended up tripping and falling flat on my face. I couldn't hear anything but the sound of my ears ringing.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked back. Allen was talking, but there was no sound. I closed my eyes and held my head in my hands. I think I said something like, "Give me a moment." But I didn't hear a sound come out of my mouth.

Slowly my hearing came back and the first thing I heard was Allen yell, "We don't have a moment!" right in my ear. I pushed him away.

"Dude, I hear you!" I yelled. "You don't have to scream in my ear."

I looked around. "Where did that go off at?"

"Right beside you, outside the trench. We need to get going. They're more and more like that to come!"

"Right." I said, jumping to my feet.

When we finally reached the base, I had about twenty scratches _just _on my face. Allen looked better, but not by much. We were panting hard from running that much. The base was far away from where we were in the trench.

"Sir!" A solider saluted as I walked into the base.

"Yeah, yeah." I growled as I stumbled through the door.

The men were already ready. They had their guns and their uniform on. They were even all standing up, in a salute.

"How many do you need, sir." One asked.

"Forty." I answered.

"Location?"

"Uhh… six miles north. Or was it west." I scathed my head, trying to remember.

"South." Allen chipped in, glaring at me.

They were already in rows of ten, so four lines went out the door.

"Why don't you guys sit down and take a breather, sirs?" A soldier said, after saluting.

"Nah, we need to get back out there." Allen said.

"Hold on. I would love it if you had some food." I protested.

"We have some food, sir." Another solider said proudly.

"Then I'm in. What about you, Allen?"

"No, thank you. I'll wait outside. Just hurry up."

"Yeah yeah. So, where's the food?" I asked eagerly.

The soldier directed my to the cafeteria. I threw off my top of my uniform on the seat beside me and dug into the food they gave me.

After I ate my meal, I smiled and thanked the solider. I grabbed my uniform roughly and followed the man to the entrance.

"Finally." Allen complained once I came out of the door.

"Shut your face. I was hungry."

"We ate in the trench." he complained as we started to walk.

"Yeah, a candy bar. So hunger-quenching." I rolled my eyes.

"Hunger-quenching?" He asked, chuckling at my terrible vocab.

"Shut up!" I yelled.

Once we were about ten feet from the base, I touched my uniform pocket, where I kept Al's note. But it wasn't there. I stopped walking and shoved my hand into the pocket frantically.

"Oh no." I gasped.

"What?" Allen asked, looking back at me.

"Al's note. It's gone!" I yelled.

"Oh no!" He pretended to look shocked, then he glared. "That's what happens in war, Ed. You lose things."

"No, I think I left it in the base. I must have dropped it when I took of my jacket."

"Who cares. It's just a note. It's not like he put his soul into it. What's so endearing about it?"

_It said 'I love you' on it._ I thought, but didn't dare say out loud. "Look, I have to get it. I'll be back in about five minutes. Okay. I know where it is and everything."

"Fine. Just hurry your ass up. We don't have all day, Daredevil." He winked.

I smiled. "Thanks."

I turned and ran back to the base, barging through the doors. I ran to the cafeteria, ignoring the "What's going on" and "Is he back for _more _food" comments as I passed. Once I reached my table, I searched the floor.

"Come on! Where is it?" I growled as I looked around.

"Where's what, sir?" Someone asked behind me.

I jerked up so fast, I hit my head against the table. "Son of a bitch." I growled as I rubbed my head. Great, I was becoming clumsy. That's just fucking perfect.

I looked up at the man. He was a carrying a tray with some leftover food on it. "Uhh… It's a note in a white envelope from Central. It's addressed to Edward Elric. Have you seen it?"

"No, but there is a 'Lost and Found' box." He pointed to the other end of the cafeteria. "When someone finds something without importance, they put it in there."

_Did he just call my letter_ _unimportant? _If I was in a rush, I would have kicked his ass. But instead, I thanked him and ran to the end of the cafeteria. I dug into the lost and found box, nearly tearing it out.

"Come on you stupid letter." I growled.

I dug to the bottom, throwing everything else out of the box.

"Found you!" I yelled, picking up the letter. I looked at the name, just in case. Yep, this was Alphonse's.

I smiled. "I'll put you in a safer place."

I folded up the letter until it was skinny and long. Then, I slipped into my super secret compartment. My automail.

In my automail, there was always a opening underneath, where my forearm connected to my wrist. If I bent my wrist forward, there was a tight slit that I could hide notes and such. I used it plenty of times. And as long as I had gloves on, it wouldn't come out.

I pulled my glove up farther as I walked. Suddenly, I heard a high pitch whistling sound, as if something was falling from the sky. I blinked and looked up at the ceiling. _What is-_

I couldn't even finish my thought before I felt intense pain. I went deaf and blind at the same. My body felt as it was being pulled apart, like every molecule in my body was exploding. I couldn't even scream. It hurt so bad.

Then, everything was black. There was no pain, no sound, and no light. My eyes were shut, which could explain the darkness. But once I opened them, I realized it did matter either way.

It was all white. Not a shadow or other color in sight. A white void…

I gasped in realization sat up. _A white void could only mean one thing, _I thoughtand looked behind me. I came face-to-face with the gate. I was sitting right in front of the center of it. Which kind of frightened me because I knew at any time, it could open and reveal that huge gray eye.

"Hello Edward Elric." A creepy, bone chilling voice said behind me.

Shivers ran down my spine as I turned my head to look at the monster.

He sat parallel to me. He was exactly the same as the night when we tried to bring Mom back. The black aura around him made his white skin visible to the eye. He sat exactly the same as he did that night. The only thing that was different is that he had my right arm and left leg attached to his body.

I swallowed. "What happened?"

He smiled. "You didn't realize? The base you were at was bombed."

"Bombed?" I asked quietly.

"Yes. Ironic, really. That was the one thing you told Alphonse you could survive in. And yet, you stand here before me."

"So, I'm dead?"

"Do you really have to ask, Edward Elric?" He smirked.

Just the way he said my name made me want to crawl into a ball and tremble. He controlled everything that has and will ever happen. He could take anything away from me…Even Al.

"Anyway, let's skip the no important things. I have an exchange that you might find very respectable."

"Go on." I urged.

"You want to survive to see your baby brother again, correct?"

I nodded. "Yes." _What is he thinking?_

"Well, what's the one thing your brother wants, other than seeing you?"

"Uhh… Well, he wants my arm and leg back more than anything. And you already have those."

"Precisely, but there's one thing your brother wants specifically. And that's to hear you talk."

"Talk?"

"Yes. He understands that you had to go away. He would be fine as long as he got to _hear _you. Of course, you couldn't supply that need. But back to the exchanged. How does this sound. I'll keep you alive, if you give me your ability to talk."

"You mean, take my voice?" I asked.

"Yes. Your voice _and _your vocal chords."

"Do I really have a say in this?"

He smiled. "Of course not. But I love seeing the excitement in people when they think they have the power over their fate. Then, they're disappointed when I take that power away."

I was about to say 'You're a monster.' but I knew better than to piss him off. As long as it's just my voice, I don't care if he takes it away. I can still see Alphonse.

"So, do you want to answer or do you want me to just do the exchange myself?"

He was toying with me, that much was obvious. But, I still responded. "Do it."

His gentle smile quickly turned evil. He stood up. "Very well."

Blue strings of light wrapped around my throat and entered my mouth. Tear formed in my eyes from the ripping sensation I felt as he took my vocal chords away. My throat felt burning hot, then freezing cold. I fell to the ground, clutching my neck. I opened my mouth to say 'what' but nothing came out.

"It won't work." He said. Then, his voice changed into something familiar. "Your voice is mine now."

My eyes widened and I looked up at him. That was my voice. Of course, what did I expect?

'The next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. So, to answer your question, Alphonse. Yes, I did die. But I paid a price to survive.'

Alphonse was reading the notebook, his eyes opened wide the whole time. But once he read the last sentence, I saw tears collect in his eyes. He looked up at me with that depressed look and sniffed.

Suddenly, he tackled me and hugged me tightly. "So it's my fault your voice is gone?"

I shook my head and hugged him back.

"I'm sorry, Ed. This is all my fault." He cried, clutching my hospital shirt.

Forgetting that my voice was gone, I said. 'I love you.' But once I realized nothing came out, I hugged him tighter. There's no way I could stop him from blaming himself. Writing notes isn't convincing. If I wanted to prove to him it wasn't his fault, I had to talk to him. And I couldn't do that.

So as I laid there, hugging him back, I realized that there was no way I carry the burden Alphonse had.

Some big brother I am…


	8. Our code

"Alright Ed, you can leave the hospital as soon as I get your prescription. How does that sound?" Dr. Itami said.

Ed and I were sitting on the bed, talking about unimportant things. It was 6 p.m, and Ed was about to fall asleep.

Ed smiled at his doctor and put his thumb up.

"Good. I'll be back then." He said, walking out of the room.

It was silent for a little as Ed scribbled something on the notepad. He held it up for me to read. 'We should use some kind of code because I'm getting sick of writing notes.'

I laughed. "You can always just mouth what you say."

He shook his head.

"Why not?"

He wrote on the notepad and gave it to me. 'It's hard to understand what I'm saying and you might be confused. Besides, I would look like a retard.'

I laughed. "Fine. But can you mouth things _sometimes?"_

He smiled, nodding. "Good. Okay, about this code. What did you have in mind, Ed? Do you mean something like sign language or Morse Code."

'Kinda.' He wrote. 'I was thinking more of making up our own code.'

I blinked. "Why."

He shrugged. 'So you can be the only one I can talk to, I guess. There are a lot of people who know Morse Code and sign language. I want something that only you can understand.'

"That's a pretty good idea!" I exclaimed, smiling. I grabbed the notebook and pencil out of his hands. "Let's get started!"

It took us about an hour to agree and memorize everything. What we made was something like Morse Code, but not quite. Each letter is noise coordinated. When Ed snaps his fingers, he needs to spell out each letter with the different pitches. It's simpler than you think.

'You don't have to use it, Alphonse. You can just talk out loud.' He snapped out, smiling.

'But I do need to practice once in a while to be sure.' I snapped back.

'Fine.'

Suddenly, the door opened. Dr. Itami came in, carrying two pill bottles. "Ready to go, Ed?"

Ed nodded, slowly moving to get out of bed.

I jumped up before him and was about to help him, when he snapped. 'I can do it!'

I crossed my arms. "Can you?"

He glared and weakly pushed himself to his feet. 'See.' He snapped before wobbling.

I caught him just before he fell flat on his face. "You can do it, huh?" I scowled.

'I hate you.' He said.

I laughed and pushed him up his feet. He grabbed onto my shoulders and held me at arms' length. Once his legs adjusted to the weight, he let go of me. Then he smiled and stretched. 'Can we go now? I need a shower.'

I chuckled and took the pills from Dr. Itami, who was watching us in confusion. "Thanks, Doctor."

"You're welcome. Now, I do have some condition I need to explain to you both."

Ed grabbed the notebook and got ready to write, just as a precaution. He nodded, as if to say go in.

"Alright. Ed, you need to take it easy. Knowing you, I'll see you back here in two days from sparing too early."

Ed smirked. 'True.' he mouthed.

"Alright, tomorrow you can start eating solid foods, but you need to take it easy with them. Eating too much can make you very sick."

Ed rolled his eyes. The doctor continued. "You need to take these pills twice a day."

'Both?' Ed wrote.

Dr. Itami nodded. "Yep! No alcohol. I know you just came back from war and such, but drinking your problems away isn't the answer. Talk to Alphonse here."

I blinked and nodded.

"I was going to give you the address for a therapist, because that's mandatory for anyone that comes back from war, but since you can't talk, I guess that's useless."

Ed smiled. 'Thank you no vocal chords!' He snapped so only I could hear.

"And Alphonse, there are your rules. You have to stay with Ed at all times. He is still healing and if he breaks anything by falling or such, he can't call out. He could die. So, you need to be there."

'Even in the shower?' Ed wrote.

"No, but you have to stay in the bathroom. Okay, Al?"

I nodded. He continued. "Make sure Ed takes his pills and talk to him once in awhile so he doesn't feel… well, useless."

Ed crossed his arms. The doctor chuckled. "I guess that's all. You guys can go. I can call a taxi for you."

"If it's not too much trouble, could you please?" I asked politly.

He smiled and nodded. "Of course. Oh, and Ed."

Ed looked up.

"I better not see you again here." Dr. Itami scowled.

'I doubt your wish will come true.' Ed wrote, smirking.

He chuckled. "That I know to well. I'll go call your taxi."

"Thanks for everything." I called as he left the room. He waved behind his back. I smiled and looked back at Ed.

"Time to go home." I said.

He smiled.

We were waiting outside for our taxi. It was only five minutes away, so we decided to wait outside awhile. I gave Ed my jacket, but he rejected it and told me. 'I don't want you to get cold.' So, instead, I sat behind Ed on the stairs and held him closer to my body. The sleeve of the jacket rested on Ed's arms.

"Are you warming up?" I asked softly.

He nodded and dropped his head on my shoulder. He stared up at the stars. There was a minute of silence before I said. "What are you thinking about."

He shrugged. 'I'm just wondering how Allen is doing out there on his own. He's such a bastard.'

I blinked. _He's thinking about _that. _Why?_

I almost asked, but just as I opened my mouth, the taxi pulled up. Ed smiled and stood up quickly. He held his hand out for me. I blinked. _Why does he do this? He's in a short sleeved shirt, yet wants me to have the jacket. His legs and arms are still weak, yet he wants to help me up. This should be the other away around. Why? Why isn't it the way it's suppose to be?_

I sat up on my own, ignoring Ed's hand. He blinked. 'Alphonse?' I opened the door to the taxi and held it open for him. He blushed and ducked his head. Then, he slowly got into the car. I smiled and sat in after him.

The taxi pulled up to the apartment. I gave him money and looked at Ed. Ed was leaning against the door, sound asleep. I sighed, but smiled.

I walked out of the taxi and went over to Ed's side. I opened the door slightly, catching him before he fell out. Then, I picked him up. Ed was surprising light. I thought the automail would add some pounds, but he's still as light as a feather.

I hooked his legs around my waist and put my forearm on his back to keep him up. I carefully put his arms around my shoulder. Ed unconsciously moved his head, placing right under my chin.

I thanked the taxi driver and carried Ed to the apartment. Once I got to our room, I carefully laid Ed down on the couch. I would put him in his bed, but if I want to make breakfast tomorrow, I needed to be able to see him.

I walked to his bedroom and pulled out his pajamas. Ed can keep his boxer on because I'm not taking those off. I walked back into the living room and laid Ed flat on his back.

I pulled off his shirt and replaced it with a white t-shirt. Ed was still the whole time, which was abnormal. But once I touched his pants, he flinched and curled into a ball. I sighed.

"Jeez, Ed. You're killing me here." I whispered as I laid him flat again.

Once I finally got the pants off, I pulled his pajama pants on. He once again curled into a ball, a scowl on his face. I grabbed the blanket that was laying over the couch and wrapped it around his small figure.

He slowly grabbed the blanket and pulled it up until only the top of head was shown. I sighed.

"Goodnight, Ed." I whispered, pushing a strand of hair from his face.

I sat on the chair, which was across the couch, and found a comfortable position. Then, I fell asleep, worrying about Ed's safety if he woke up before me.


	9. Bad Feeling?

I woke up from a unwanted light shining in my eyes. My eyes slowly slid opened. The sun's light blinded me. I groaned and shielded my eyes.

_Damn sun. _I thought bitterly, looking around. _Where am I?_

I was in a familiar looking living room, on a soft white couch. A blanket wrapped around my waist, which was no longer cover in those comfortable hospital pants.

'Alphonse?' I snapped loudly. I can't believe I remember the letters. I thought I would forget when I slept. Which reminds me, when did I fall asleep. The last thing I remember, I was in the taxi.

I sat up slowly, my ribs sent a painful shock threw my body. I didn't have to ask the doctor to know they were broken. I knew that since yesterday.

I stood up weakly. As soon as I took a deep breath, I smelt the most delicious smell ever. _Stew! _

I followed the smell through the halls until I came to the most recognizable room in the whole apartment. The kitchen. Through it's thick door, I heard soft humming….

'Alphonse?' I tapped on the door.

"In here, Ed." He assured.

I opened the door and looked into the kitchen. Al was standing over the stove, his old baby blue apron was tightly wrapped around his waist. He smiled back at me.

"Good morning." He greeted.

'I missed seeing you in that.' I snapped out, referring to his girly apron.

He blushed and looked down. "I think it's cute." He protested.

I laughed silently. 'I think so too, my baby brother. So, what are you cooking?'

"You know that answer better than anyone, Ed." he smirked, stirring the pot on the stove.

'I knew it. You made stew! But isn't it a little early in the morning for stew?'

He blinked. "Did you even bother to look at the time when you came in here? It's 1:30."

'Damn. Why didn't you wake me up? I would have helped you with breakfast.'

He shrugged. "I wanted you to sleep in more. You seemed very restless yesterday because woke up early. So, I wanted you to sleep in for a bit."

'Well, thanks.' I snapped.

He smiled. "You just sit at the table and drink some coffee."

I nodded and poured myself some coffee. Afterwards, I leaned back in a kitchen chair. 'So, what's new since I have been gone. Fill me in.'

"Nothing really enjoyable happened, I can tell you that." He murmured, turning around to look at me. "I started working at a café."

'Which one?'

"The one right across the street. You never went there before, but I used to go there every week. Remember?"

'No, I don't remember that.' I snapped thoughtfully.

Al blinked and gave me a concerned look.

'Anyway, what happens to me when you have to go to work?'

He smiled. "You'll just have to sit there for the whole day!"

'Sounds fun.' I said rolling my eyes, showing him I was being sarcastic.

"Melody, my manager, told me she wants to meet you." he stated, turning to the stove to stir the stew.

'Really. Why?' I asked.

"She said… uh." I blinked. Alphonse face had suddenly turned light red. "She said I talk about you a lot."

I could get the feeling he wasn't telling me the whole thing. But as soon as I was about ask, Al exclaimed. "Stew's done!"

We ate lunch, talking about nothing with real important. Al's stew was the _best. _Of course, I always loved Mom's, but Alphonse kicked hers out of the park. We were smiling to each other through the whole meal.

_I missed this. _I thought as he told me about this one customer at the café. _I'm glad to see Al smile again. It feels as if I can talk after all. But I can't shake this bad feeling off. It's probably nothing._

After lunch, Alphonse told me I should get in the shower. I undressed and jumped into the shower, then tapped the wall saying. 'You can come in now.' I heard the door close as I wetted my hair.

"So what do you want to do today?" He asked.

I smirked and tapped on the wall. 'Aren't I suppose to be resting.'

He paused. "Yeah, but that's boring."

'Pfft(yeah, I actually tapped that out), some brother you are.'

He chuckled lightly. "It's not like I plan to run a marathon with you. I was thinking about something peaceful."

'Like what? What do you have in mind?' I asked as I massaged my head with coconut shampoo. _I missed you so much, shampoo. _

"I don't know. A movie. Going to the library. Anything I guess." He answered.

'Whatever sounds good to you.' I relied.

We stayed silent until I came out of the shower, wrapped in a towel of course. Al opened the door for me, following me to my bedroom.

'You stay out here.' I snapped once I dried my fingers.

He smiled. "Of course."

I walked into my room alone and shut the door. Ignoring that I was only in a towel, I jumped onto my bed. I nuzzled my pillow. _Hello again my soft bed. I missed you. _

I sat up and walked over to the dresser, almost tripping on the mess on my floor. There weren't many comfortable clothes I had, so I just grabbed jeans and a black t-shirt.

After I looked decent, I walked out of my room. Alphonse smiled at me.

"How about we go to the library?" He asked as we walked down the hallway. "I need to return that book."

'Sure.' I snapped gladly, yet the bad feeling pulling at the back if my head. Up until now, I was ignoring it. I was probably just paranoid. It's normal for people when they come back from war.

But I wasn't only paranoid. I was worried. There was something telling me to lock the door and cuddle Al next to me so he cannot get hurt. But I also had the feeling to get away from the house as soon as possible. The last time I had this feeling was the time Al lost his body and I lost my limbs.

I grabbed my automail unconsciously. _I just hope nothing happens to Al. _


	10. Disappearence

"So, Ed. What do you want for dinner tonight?" I asked.

Ed was laying on the couch, reading the book he got at the library. He had his feet propped up on me. I was sitting on the other side of the couch, looking at Ed. For awhile now, I was trying to figure out what was wrong with him. He seemed to be worried about something. At the library, he wouldn't leave my side. Usually, he would just wonder off.

'Stew.' Ed answered, pausing his reading to look up at me before going back to his book.

I smirked. "How about something other than the thing we eat every day?"

He smiled. Before he went to war, we had stew _every _single night. Sometimes, we had Winry's apple pie too. But no matter what we had stew. It was obvious that we both loved it. But that wasn't the only reason. Ed would never admit it, but we also wanted to imagine that mom was still alive.

Ed shrugged. 'I'm actually not really hungry.'

"Edward Elric, _not _hungry. That's impossible." I replied, chuckling.

He glared. I gently lifted Ed's feet and stood up. Once Ed's feet were back on the couch, he immediately sat up.

'Where are you going?' He asked, frantically.

I smiled at his concern. "Don't worry. I'm just going to make stew."

He frowned, but laid back down again. I walked into the kitchen, getting ready to make the stew.

"Darn it. I should have checked the ingredients before I started making it." I growled to myself after I realize that I was short one ingredient.

I already started making the stew, so it was pointless to stop now. I'll just have to go get the ingredient myself. The store was only five minutes away anyway.

I walked to the living room. "Ed, I need to-"

I stopped when I heard a soft snore. _What the…_ I said in my head as I walked closer to the couch. Once I looked over the couch, is saw that Ed was fast asleep. The book was on his chest and his other hand was resting on his stomach, his shirt lifted a little.

I sighed. "Don't sleep with your tummy out, Ed." I pushed his shirt down over his hand.

_I'll only be gone a few minutes. There's no point waking him up. He needs sleep. _I confirmed in my head, grabbing my coat from the hook. Instead of taking my shoes, I just grabbed my slippers. After taking a quick glance at Ed, I walked out the door.

Ed's P.O.V

I slowly opened my eyes. _Did I fall asleep? Jeez._ I groaned and sat up, the book falling off my chest. It was odd. You would think I would start to smell food, since Al was cooking. But there was none.

I slowly pulled myself up, ignoring the pain in my ribs, and walked to the kitchen.

'Al?' I snapped, opening the door.

Al wasn't there. The ingredients for stew were there, but Al wasn't. My heart skipped a beat.

I turned from the kitchen and walked to his room. He wasn't there either. He wasn't in the bathroom, my room, _or _the dining room. I ended up in the living room again, shaking noticeably.

I grabbed my coat and yanked my shoes on. Al's shoes were right beside mine, so he couldn't have went anywhere. _I knew I shouldn't have left him out of my sight! Why did I have to fall asleep? I'm such an idiot!_

Once I was out of the apartment, I practically ran down the steps, almost slipping on the ice. There was a light snow fall, which felt like glass against my skin as I jogged down the sidewalk. I couldn't exactly run because of my ribs. Hell, even jogging made a shock of pain go up my body. But I ignored it. I had to find Al!

I was the only one on the streets, which was good because I was snapping 'Alphonse' loudly and other people would think I was crazy. Maybe I was. But who cares? I need to find Alphonse.

'Alphonse!' I tired to scream, but nothing came out of my mouth. I tried again and again, but there was nothing. I stopped jogging and came to a stop in the middle of the street. _How am I suppose to find him without talking! Damn it! _

I shivered and hugged myself to keep some warmth in. It was fucking freezing out here! _If Al was out here, what he froze to death? _I shivered at the thought. _No! Don't think that. Think of something positive._

I couldn't think of anything. Instead, I came up with more terrible ideas. I shook my head and snapped over the wind. There was no response, which wasn't surprising considering I could hardly hear the snaps.

I jogged around the town desperately. My ribs were on fire, but I kept going. There were no signs of Al, which scared me the most. _I knew this would happen. I had this damn uneasy feeling all fucking day!_

Eventually, I trudged back to the apartment. I think the stitches in my side has opened. I felt my warm blood run down my skin. I was noticeably tired as I grabbed the pole on my apartments stair for support.

I slowly opened the door to our room. Numbly, I yanked my coat off and hung it up. As I putting my shoes away, I saw something I didn't see earlier. Al's slippers.

My eyes widened as I walked to the kitchen. I threw open the door. Alphonse was standing over the stove, mixing ingredients together. He looked up and saw me.

"Ed? Where were you? Why are you covered in snow?" He asked, putting down the bowl and looking at me with concern.

I silently walked up to him. He blinked.

"What's wrong, Ed?" he asked.

I threw my arms around him, tightly clinging to his body.

"E-Ed!" He gasped, his body still. "What's wrong!"

Eventually, he relaxed and wrapped his arms around my sides. He obviously felt how cold I was because he shivered.

"Ed! You're bleeding!" he shrieked after a few minutes, pulling his hand away from my side.

I hugged him tightly, symbolizing I didn't care.

'Damn it, where were you!' I snapped at him.

"Me? I went to the store to pick up something I needed. Where were you? I got home and you disappeared off the couch. I just assumed you went into the bed. But you're freezing cold!" He rambled on.

I smiled and laughed silently. 'I'm glad you're okay.'

He froze. "You too, Ed."


	11. Perfection

After we ate stew, Ed fell asleep on the couch again. I had to carry him up to bed. He was light, so it didn't bother me. It was just like last night when he fell asleep in the cab.

Once I got his pajama pants on, I wrapped him in the bed. He never told me where he was, but I assume he was trying to find me. He is my brother, after all. Always trying to risk his life for me.

I smiled down at his peaceful face. _All mine… _I tucked his hair behind his ear. _He's finally awake and all mine once more. _I wonder what look Ed would give me if I told him my thoughts, although I never will. I admit that I love Ed a_ little _more than usual. But with all things we went through, wouldn't that be normal?

…I'm scared to know the answer.

I sighed. _Who cares? As long as I have Ed, I don't care about silly questions. _

I made a little bed on the floor and laid down. After a few minutes of staring at Ed's sleeping face, I fell asleep.

* * *

My eyes slowly opened, pulling me out of my dream. _Why did I wake up? _I questioned myself as I rubbed my eyes. Suddenly, I heard a small gasp coming from Ed's bed. I blinked.

"Ed?" I stood up, looking down at my brother.

Ed was twisting around in his bed, his face showed pure agony. He was having another nightmare. I put a hand on Ed's shoulder, shaking gently.

"Ed. Hey, Ed. Wake up." I said loudly.

He started shaking, burying his face into the blanket gathered up on the side of him.

'Al…Alphonse.' he mouthed.

_Another dream like that? _I wondered in my head. Every since I got my body back, Ed has had stranger dreams than normal. Now, his dreams are usually about my body being stolen once more by the truth. And he's always helpless to do anything.

Of course, Ed doesn't tell me his dream. But before his voice was taken away, he'd sleep talk. After awhile, I pieced it all together. But he would never bring it up, so I could never help him.

"Ed, I'm here. I have a body. I'm right here." I told him as I slowly pulled him into my arms. He was shaking fiercely and his skin was as cold as ice. But his thrashing motions stopped once he was in my arms.

"Wake up, Ed." I whispered into his ear. "I'm here."

Suddenly, Ed's hand was on my head and he was hugging me back.

'Alphonse.' He mouthed against my skin. Then, I felt his shoulders shake and a warm drop of water fall on my shoulder. I smiled.

"It's okay to cry, Ed." I whispered, hugging him tightly.

'I'm not crying, stupid.' He tapped out on my back after sniffing.

I smiled. "Of course not."

We stayed like that until I knew that Ed was calm enough to back to sleep. "I'll sleep with you tonight." I told him as he fell back on the bed. He nodded and pulled the blanket around him, holding up a corner for me to hop in.

I smiled and snuggled beside him. Before he had the time to protested, I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him into my chest. He looked up at me, shocked. 'Al?'

"Tonight, I'll be the one protecting you, Ed." I whispered.

'I don't need help.' He mouth back, anger on his face.

I smiled and kissed his nose. "Too bad. Like I said, I'll be protecting you. I can chase away all those bad dreams. You're okay when I'm here."

He rolled his eyes, trying to hid the smile on his face. 'Fine, but just for tonight.'

He snuggled closer and closed his eyes. I smiled once I heard his even breaths. I caressed his cheek, pushing his hair back in the process. _Just let me protect you for once, Ed. You always risk your life for me. I can't do anything about that, because it's your natural brotherly reaction. But if 'chasing away those bad dreams' is the only thing I can do for you, I'll do it no matter what. _

* * *

Ed's P.O.V

I grudgingly opened my eyes. The first thing I noticed was a pare of arms around my waist, keeping me still. Second thing, I was curled up against Alphonse's chest. I looked up at his face.

He had a faint blush on his face and his eyes were closed softly. The sun was reflecting off his perfect pale face. His hair was ruffled from sleeping, giving him a laid back look. I'd say he looked like an angel, but that's _way _to cliché for my taste.

_Thanks Alphonse. _I acknowledged to him silently. I slowly wiggled out of his arms, trying not to make the would reopen, and stood up. I pulled the blanket over his body more and kissed him on the forehead. I do that every morning if he's asleep. Of course, I'll never tell him that.

I grabbed some comfortable clothes and walked to the bathroom. I didn't bother braiding my hair. Al liked it when it was down anyway. After I was done, I walked to the kitchen. Al made breakfast yesterday, so today is my turn.

* * *

'Good morning, Al.' I tapped on the stove once I saw him walk in.

He looked around confused. "What are you doing?"

On table, I put bread, two plates of eggs, two plates of bacon, honey, Al's tea, and my coffee. He now looked at that in shock.

'Making breakfast.' I answered, sitting at my side of the table.

He blinked and sat down across from me. "Well, I can see that. But, why?"

I smiled. 'You made it yesterday. It's my turn.'

He smiled at me after a moment. "Thanks."

We ate in comfortable silence, eating the food that I burnt. He didn't complain about my cooking. He never does. I try not to burn it, but I guess I'm just not the cooking type. Al is, though. He makes the best food ever. And I will never compare to him.

Suddenly, the ring of our telephone sliced through the air. On reaction, I stood up to grab it. But Al smiled and put a hand on my shoulder, telling me to sit back down before walking to the phone.

"Hello?" He asked, wiping the crumbs of bread of his mouth. "Oh, good morning, Melody…Yes…Of course… Haha… Alright, I'll be there soon."

He hung up and sat back down. 'Who was that?' I asked, tapping my fork on the table.

"My manager. I need to go back into work today."

'When?'

He looked up at me. "Do you want to go after breakfast? The sooner I go, the sooner I get off."

'Sure.'

* * *

After we ate and cleaned the dishes, we got ready to go. Right now, I was sitting on the counter in the bathroom. Al was behind my changing his clothes. While, I was yanking the brush through my knotty hair, about to just give up and throw something. But as soon as I was going to do that, Al took the brush out of my hand.

He sighed. "I'll do it, Ed."

I scowled, but turned my body and faced the bathroom mirror, giving him access to my hair. He smiled and ran the brush through my hair softly. As the knots slowly started to go away, I realized my eyes were closed. No one ever brushed my hair for me and it felt good. I smiled inwardly and relaxed my shoulders.

"Done." Al exclaimed, to my disappointment.

'Thanks.' I tapped sadly. I didn't want him to stop.

I lifted my hand to reach back and pulled my hair back, but Alphonse took my wrist and grabbed the hair tie. I blinked, but shrugged my shoulder anyway.

"Braid or ponytail, Ed?" He asked me as he refreshed my hair until it was all smooth and in his hands.

'High ponytail.' I answered, looking at his reaction in the mirror.

He smiled and pulled my hair back until it was perfect, before tying it up. After he was done, he smiled and patted me on the back before walking out of the bathroom.

"Meet me at the door when you're done, Ed." He called back, smiling at me.

I blinked and reached up to my ponytail. It was perfect. Not a bump or flaw in it. I smiled. Everything Al did was perfect. Whether it his cooking, his conversational skills, or just everyday things like tying my hair back. He's so perfect.

And I might be a little jealous of that.


	12. Unexpected Guest

We arrived at the café. Ed had pajama pants and a long sleeve black shirt with a coat over it. He also had his alchemy book. It looked like he was ready to have a sleepover. But it didn't matter what he looked like. He wasn't going to be doing much.

Ed and I already came up with a game plan. He would sit at the closet table to me and read his book. If anyone talked to him, I would translate the snaps for him.

"Good morning, Alphonse." Melody said when she heard us walk through the door.

She looked back at me and blinked when she saw Ed. Then, she smiled.

"You must be Edward!" She exclaimed loudly.

Ed blinked and nodded. Mel walked out him and shook his hand.

"It's so good to meet the person Al talks _on _and _on _about."

I blushed. "I do not!"

Ed mute laughed and I lightly punched him in the arm. "Go sit down Ed." I commanding, trying to hide the blush on my face.

He smirked and waked to the closet table to the register. He waved at me over his shoulder before sitting. I watched him until I couldn't see him anymore. I sighed.

"You're brother's pretty cute, huh, Al?" Mel smiled at me.

_Of course he is. _I smiled. "I wouldn't let him hear you say that."

Her smile dropped. "Why?"

"He'll flip out on you. Ed thinks 'cute' is a girly word. He said something like, 'I'm a man, words like '_cute' _or '_pretty_' are degrading to me.'" I said lowly in my Ed impression.

She laughed. "Well as long as he doesn't know what I said, it doesn't matter."

I smiled as a customer walked up. After I took his order, I said to Mel. "I can keep a secret."

She laughed and patted my back. "Get to work, buddy."

I laughed.

* * *

After an hour or so, I grabbed some coffee and walked out to Ed's table. I leaned on the booth's chair. Ed was sitting up, his knees pressed to the table. The book was sitting on his lap.

"Ed, I-" I stopped once I heard a snore. I blinked. "Ed?"

I moved until I was in front of him. He had his head down and his eyes closed. _Wow, Ed. _I sat down across form him and put the coffee on the table. As much as I didn't want to, I reached over to shook him awake.

"Ed, you need to get up." I told him.

He shook my hand away in annoyance, mouthing the words 'Go away.' I smiled.

"Come on, Ed. I have to get back to work. Get up!" I grumbled, continuing to shake him.

He grudgingly opened his eyes, scowling at me. 'What?' he mouthed.

I smiled. "You can't fall asleep. Especially in that position. You're going to hurt your neck."

He grabbed the coffee, assuming it was for him, and chugging it down. He slammed the empty cup on the table, smiling. I rolled my eyes, but smiled.

"I'm almost off work. Afterwards, we can go do something. But right now, you need to stay awake and read. Or come talk with me. Whichever." I said, standing back up.

He stuck his tongue out at me. I rolled my eyes.

"You're _so _mature, Ed." I replied.

He smirked and changed the page of his book. I smiled and started to walk away. But once I passed Ed, he grabbed onto my shirt. I glanced at him over my shoulder.

"What is it?" I asked.

He smiled and handed me the coffee cup. I sighed.

"Sure, I'll get you more coffee." I replied before he even had time to snap.

I walked back to the cash register, realizing there was a customer. I smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry for the wait."

"No problem." The woman said. She was about the same age as Gracia. "I didn't want to interupt you and your boyfriend."

…_Boyfriend? _"Oh, no, ma'am. You got it all wrong. He's my brother, not my b-boyfriend." I stuttered, feeling my cheeks getting warmer and warmer with every second that passed.

"Really. Oh, I'm sorry. I could have sworn you two were dating."

"No. We're both guys, isn't that wrong?"

She smiled. "Let me tell you something very important. Love is love, no matter what. Gender, race, age, family, and origins doesn't matter. If you really love them, you'll see pass that stuff."

I blinked. _No matter what…? _

I smiled softly. "Thanks. What will you be having today?"

"Tea, please." She answered.

* * *

What she said had stayed in my head all day. _I wouldn't dare date Ed. That's incest _and _homosexuality. They are both wrong. But then again, she did say no matter what. No! I can't be thinking of Ed this way. Besides, he wouldn't like me back anyway._

I suddenly felt sad, though I didn't understand why. It was never a possibility anyway. I can't be disappointed if I wasn't looking forward to something.

_Or maybe I was… _I contradicted myself.

Suddenly, I felt something pull on my shirt. I blinked and looked down. Ed had a confused look on his face. Then, he pointed in front of him. I followed his fingers. We were in front of our apartment.

_I don't even remember leaving to store. _I grumbled to myself as I dug in my pocket for the key. _Darn it. I'm starting to become uncoordinated again. I hate that feeling! _

Once I finally got the door unlocked and opened, we walked in. Ed stopped in front of me and crossed his arms. He had that determined look on his face.

"What?" I asked.

'Are you feeling okay? Is something bugging you?' He snapped out.

I shook my head, smiling. "Nope. I was just thinking about what we are going to do tonight." I lied.

Ed knew I was lying. He saw right pass my fake happy-go-lucky tone. But, his shrugged, indicating he didn't care.

'Lets stay home tonight.' He answered. 'I'm too tired and I don't know why.'

He threw off his coat, dropping it on the floor, and jumping onto the couch. I picked up his jacket.

"Your body is still healing, Ed. Besides, you were always tired before." I smirked.

'That's true.'

I carefully place his coat on the rack, next to mine. "Well, we can always-"

I was cut off by a high pitched _ring!_ I blinked and walked to the telephone.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hello, Alphonse." Mustang said on the other line.

"Oh. Hi, sir."

"I just got a call that Fullmetal was out of the hospital."

"Yeah. Sorry I didn't call you about it yet." I said.

'Who is it?' Ed snapped, walking up to me. I leaned away from the phone and mouthed. 'Mustang.' He nodded and walked away. I watched him until I couldn't see him.

"Alphonse? Are you still there?" Mustang said.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry. What did you say?" I asked, blushing.

"I said, it's fine that you didn't tell me. And that I have a visitor here who wants to talk to Fullmetal."

"A visitor?"

"Yeah, I was planning to bring him over." He said.

"Oh, sure. We're not doing anything anyway." I replied, watching as Ed came out of the kitchen with a chocolate bar.

I rolled my eyes as Mustang said. "Great. I'll see you when I get there."

"Goodbye." I hung up. Then, I turned to Ed. "There is a visitor coming for you with Mustang."

He looked back at me and snapped. 'Who is it?'

"He didn't say. But he's on his way."

Ed flopped down on the couch. 'Jeez. I want to sleep, not talk with some person.'

I smiled. "Wow, Ed. You wait here for the visitor, I have something to do."

I walked down the hall. Instead of staying there, I heard Ed following me. 'What are you going to do?'

I walked into my old bedroom. _I don't trust myself to sleep with him anymore. _"I'm going to drag my bed into your room."

'Why?'

"Because it's cramped with two of us to a bed."_ That was a horrible lie. _"Besides, if you have the whole bed to yourself, I bet you'll heal faster because you want be mashed up against someone else."

'How is that going to help?' He asked, sitting on the floor.

I smiled and began to pull my bed out the room. I almost broke my back just trying to pull. Imagine what I'll have to go through to get it past the door.

Ed smiled and stood up.

'Here, I'll help.' he suggested, walking to the bed.

"No! You need to relax or you'll pop open more stitches." I protested.

He held the chocolate in his mouth by his teeth and snapped. 'Calm down. I'm not even attempting to lift this shit.'

He clapped his hands together and touched them to the bed. After the familiar flash of blue light, I looked at what he did.

"What the…" I blinked at the object.

Ed turned my bed into a black box… wow.

He smiled and picked up the box. Then, we walked out of the room, gesturing for me to follow. I followed in curiosity. We walked into his room.

He placed the box parallel to his bed, beside the wall with the window. Once he evened it out perfectly, he clapped his hands together and clasped it on the box. After the light, I glanced at his creation.

It was my bed! It looked the same as before, except on the edges it had the aftershock of the alchemy, which looked like little bricks. But, other than that, it was exactly the same. I would have never thought of something so genius! Of course, Ed is a prodigy. He was always better than me…

A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts. Ed and I exchanged looks and we walked to the front door. He pulled the chocolate bar out of his mouth. He crossed his arms and scowled. I rolled my eyes lightly, hiding my smile, before finally reaching then door. I opened it, revealing Ed's unexpected guest.

'Allen?' Ed mouthed beside me.


	13. Jealous

Sure enough, my old war buddy, Allen, was standing at the door. His dirty blonde hair was rough, like always but his piercing green looked brighter than normal. He had cuts and bruises all over his arms and face. He was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans. This was the first time I saw him in something so casual. In his one hand was a suitcase.

"Daredevil!" He yelled, pulling me against him body with one arm and ruffling my hair. "You said five minutes, you lying bastard."

I smiled and punched him in the arm. He smirked and let go. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mustang walk through the door.

"Fullmetal." He greeted blandly.

'Bastard.' I mouthed back at him.

I saw Allen blink. "Hey, Daredevil?"

I looked up at him. 'What?'

He seemed confused, like he was trying to figure something complicated out. "Why aren't you talking?"

It had to be about five minutes that everything was just silent. It was the most awkward silence ever! I sighed and looked at Alphonse for help. He forced a smile, but he looked troubled. But before I had a chance to try and figure it out, he looked over at Mustang.

"He can't talk." He told him. "He has no vocal chords."

Mustang kept his face the same, but after he thought about it for a few seconds, his face visibly lost color. _Oh shit. Did he figure it out? _He looked over at me with a glare. _Yep, he knows._

"How'd you lose your vocal chords?" Allen asked.

_Fuck, how am I going to explain this one? _My thoughts raced, trying to come up with a good lie. Fortunately, Al saved me.

"Something happened during his surgery and his vocal chords got infected. They had to take them out, or they would swell up so much that Ed wouldn't be able to breath." He said intelligently.

_Is that even possible? _I asked in my head. Holy shit, my baby brother a fucking genius!

"Oh." Allen said. "Well that sucks! I wanted to fight with like old times, midget."

I tried to yell, but nothing came out. Instead, I settled for punching him in the face.

"I was just joking!" He yelled as he rubbed his jaw.

I smirked and shrugged. Then, I looked over at Al.

'Do you know where my notebook is?' I snapped.

He thought for a little before pointing toward the room. "I think you left it in the room."

I nodded and jogged into my room. I knew Mustang and Allen were giving me funny looks. But as I picked up the notebook, I heard Al explaining the snaps. That meant I didn't have to.

I walked back into the room, flipping to an open page. Once I found one, I pulled the pen out of the rings that held it together. Allen and Mustang were now sitting on the couch, while Al was on the chair across from it.

I flopped down beside Al on the small chair. I was practically sitting on his lap, but he didn't care. He just smiled slightly and visibly relaxed.

'What are you doing here, Allen?' I wrote, showing it to him.

He squinted for a little before smirking. "Your handwriting has not gotten any better, Ed."

I narrowed my eyes, trying to threaten him. He got the idea, because he said. "Alright, alright. I'm here because I heard you were in a coma. It took me a week to finally be able to get out here. I guess you could say I felt guilty."

'Why?' I wrote.

After he read it, he shrugged. "I don't know. I should have went with you when you went back in there."

I rolled my eyes. 'Then you would be dead.'

He shrugged. "You told me once, before we went to the battlefield, that if someone would shoot at us, you'd rather die than me. You said you'd rather feel the pain of a wound than the pain of knowing that you could have done something to prevent it."

I blinked. _I didn't even remember that, how did he?_

"Well, I felt guilty because I knew I should have done something. But I just sat there and waited for you. I did nothing, while you got hurt." He said, frowning slightly.

I shrugged my shoulders. 'There was nothing you could have done. I'm alive, aren't I? As long as I am, who cares what I been through.'

He smiled. "I guess. By the way, did you get what you were looking for?"

I smiled brightly and nodded. 'Of course I did! I wouldn't have passed out, knowing I still didn't accomplish what I went there to do.'

He rolled his eyes. "That's my Daredevil."

I smirked.

* * *

Al's P.O.V

Just who is this person to Ed? Ed has been completely ignoring me since this Allen person came. Even though he's nearly sitting on me, I feel as if we're in different worlds. He is too busy talking about things with Allen.

Mustang left a few minutes ago, saying something about paperwork and Lieutenant Hawkeye's gun. Ed didn't even realized he left. He was too busy talking to Allen about a general or something.

But even if I was ignored, I refused to leave. Leaving Ed's side would be like giving him up to this man…

_What am I thinking? _I yelled at myself in my head. _Ed is _not _a thing. He is a human being and he's not mine to give up. I don't own him! But that also means this Allen person doesn't either._

I looked up from the floor at the man sitting across from me with a smile on his face. _Was I jealous of him? Jealous of what, though?_ I narrowed my eyes at him. _Why does it matter anyway? It's not like I'm his boyfriend…_

_Although I want to be. No, wait. That's not true.… _I blinked in realization. _No, you know what. It _is _true! _What's the point of trying to kid myself? I _do _love Ed, more than a brother. I'm not going to lie to myself anymore. I always loved Ed, but I guess I never realized it until now.

I felt like a heavy weight has been lifted off my shoulders. But something in my heart tightened. Now that I admit that I love him, it hurts so much more to realize he'll never love me back. I always felt scared that Ed will be taken away from me. But now, I'm scared that he'll leave me.

How would he react if he knew I loved him like this? I didn't even want to think about it. It scared me to the point that I started shaking. _If Ed would leave me for such a thing, I don' t know how I'll go on. _I always hated seeing Ed get hurt because he could die. But I was more scared of Ed leaving me. If he died, it would be a forcible leave. We wouldn't have a choice in the matter. But if he choose to leave me, that's what scared me the most.

Suddenly I felt a hand on mine, which was clenched on the arm wrest. I blinked and looked up. Ed was looking at me with concern in his eyes. Behind him, on the couch, Allen was also looking at me. His gaze was more of 'what the heck is wrong with him?' than the worry drawn on Ed's face. I felt my heart tighten painfully.

'Are you okay?' He snapped.

I forced a smile. "Of course! Just a little tired, I guess."

I knew that he realized I was lying by the disbelief on his face. But before he could snap anything, Allen stood up behind him. He grabbed his coat, which was resting on the suitcase he brought in, and said. "Pardon me for interrupting your resting time." he said politely. "I'll leave now."

Apparently, he couldn't tell when someone was lying to cover something up. Or is Ed the only on that can see pass my lies? Either way, I was glad he was leaving. Not to be rude, but I'd rather him be gone than be pulling Ed's attention away from me. I guess that made me selfish _and _greedy. But I couldn't help feeling that way.

Ed stood up and wrote on the notebook. I got a glimpse of it before he showed Allen. He wrote, 'Where will you go?'

Allen shrugged. "I could probably rent a hotel room. It's only" He checked his watch. "9:00 p.m."

They have been talking for about an hour now. My leg was numb from being under Ed's weight for so long. But I stood up anyway.

'You can stay here.' Ed suggested on the notebook.

Allen blinked. "Really?"

He nodded. 'Sure. You can sleep on my bed.'

"Well then where will you sleep?" He asked.

'With Al.' He wrote and snapped back at me. 'Is it alright if he stays here, Al?'

_No! _My head screamed, but I smiled anyway. "Of course, Ed. If that's what you want."

He smiled. 'Thanks.'

Then, he turned to Allen and grabbed his wrist, directing him to the bedroom. I stayed behind, my hands clenched into fist. I knew Ed wasn't the nicest person around, so why would he let this stranger into our house, I mean, sure, he was with him during the war. But that was only a few weeks. This guy could be a murderer. He could kill Ed!

Of course, that was a little extreme and highly unlikely. But it was only natural for me to be worried. I don't know this guy. Ed hardly knows this guy! But he trusted him.

_I'm so selfish. _I growled in my head. _I feel jealous of anyone who talks to Ed. This person most likely doesn't even feel _that _way towards Ed, like I do. But I feel as if he's being taken away from me._

Suddenly, I heard Ed snapped behind me. 'Are you coming, Al?'

I looked behind me. Ed was in sweat pants and a black t-shirt. He was alone and smiling at me. I felt my worry shatter. _And yet every time he talks to me directly, I feel like I can fly… Wow cliché._

I smiled. "Sure."

We walked back to the room, side by side. I kept stealing glances at him, pretending that he loved me back. Pretending that he felt the same way as I did. But of course, I could only pretend. He'll never feel the same way.

So my only comfort was my imagination and the tiny things he did that make me smile.


	14. Mother's Song

I couldn't get to sleep. Maybe it was the fact that there was a stranger sleeping in the same room as Ed and I. Maybe because Ed stole all the blankets and was now pressed up against the wall beside the bed. Whichever the reason, I was no closer to sleep than when I turned out the lights. And it was about two in the morning now.

Ed stirred gently and turned over onto his back. I checked his face, trying to recognize if he was having a nightmare. But instead of agony, his face showed the peacefulness that he hid from the world. I sighed and relaxed back into the bed. I closed my eyes once more, trying to catch at least some sleep before having to wake up to make breakfast.

Suddenly, I felt two arms around me, one felt like hot flesh, the other sleep-warmed metal. I gasped lightly and opened my eyes. Ed was now snuggled up against me, his head resting on my shoulder.

Ed wasn't the type to cuddle; he rarely ever sleeps with his arms around me. But tonight, he must have sensed something was wrong. Just like a child. When they are asleep, they sense when you're upset and unconsciously try to help. Ed obviously knew something was wrong and is reflexively trying to assist me.

I sighed and wrapped my arms around him; my face buried in his shoulder. "I'm okay." I mumbled against his skin. I kept repeating that until my eyes started to drop. Eventually, I fell into the darkness. And all it took for me to finally get to sleep, was Ed's arms around me.

* * *

I woke up from a bright light that shone on my eyes. I opened my eyes grudgingly. The first thing I saw was the alarm clock. It was 5:35, way to early for the sun to be out. Then what was shining?

I sat up and looked around. The bedroom door was open. The hallway light was on, which would explain the brightness that woke me up. I glanced at Allen's bed. He wasn't there. I blinked and looked beside me on my bed. Ed wasn't there either.

My heart skipped a beat and I literally threw myself out of bed. I almost tripped before flying out of the room and looked for another room with the lights on. That room happened to be the bathroom, the door was hanging open. I narrowed my eyes and peeked in.

Ed was sitting on the counter, his cheeks flushed. His eyes were closed; noticeable dark shadows underneath. He had a rag on his mouth, wiping gently. Allen was standing over him, a hand on Ed's forehead.

"Yeah, you have a fever." Allen sighed, taking his hand away.

Ed opened his eyes and glared at the mirror behind me. 'No shit.' He mouthed. Suddenly, he face paled and he jumped down from the counter, pounced to the toilet. He barely got there in time before barfing loudly. Allen quickly pulled Ed's hair back as he empted his stomach.

After Ed was done, he laid down on the floor, wiping his mouth once more with the rag. He wipe the sweat off his forehead with his hand.

"Come on." Allen said, putting his hand out. "Let's get you to bed before Alphonse wakes up."

Ed nodded, but shooed away his hand. He slowly stood up on his own, wobbling slightly. Once he turned to get out the door, he noticed me and paused.

'Al.' he mouthed.

Allen looked back and blinked. I stepped farther into the bathroom.

"Are you okay?" I asked Ed.

He smiled weakly and nodded.

I sighed, gently taking his hand and pulling him out if the bathroom. I held his hand until we reached the kitchen. There, I told him to sit. He sat obediently and looked up at me, a curious look on his face.

I opened one of the cabinets, already knowing what I'd find inside. As I was reaching for medicine for stomach aches, I saw the pills Ed was _suppose _to take.

"Shit!" I cursed loudly, pulling them down from the shelf.

Ed blinked and looked over my shoulder. 'Fuck!' he mouthed.

"What's wrong?" Allen asked, making his presence known for the first time.

Ed tapped me lightly, silently telling me to explain.

"Ed was suppose to take pills, but I forgot to give them to him yesterday." I turned to Ed, putting my hand on his forehead.

"I wonder if that's why you're sick." I asked to myself mostly, as I pulled my hand away quickly from the pure heat rising from Ed's forehead.

Ed's faced visibly paled and he considered running to the bathroom. He knew he wasn't going to make it, so he lunged at the sink behind me. I immediate threw the pills and caught his hair before he barfed on it. I put my other hand on his shoulder, massaging gently.

He stood up straighter, wiping his mouth on a paper towel Allen handed him. I grabbed his pills once more, which laded on the counter, and unscrewed the cap. Ed immediate took the pills once I gave them to him. Allen then lead him into the living room to rest.

I sighed. As I got Ed some water, I thought. _Could it have been the pills? Usually, when Ed doesn't take his pills, nothing happens. I wonder if these are an exception or did Ed just have a virus._ I paused, considering the answer in my head, before shrugging and walking to the living room.

Ed was lying down on the couch, his head propped up on the pillow.

"Where's Allen?" I asked, handing him the water.

He tapped the glass with his automail hand. 'I told him to go back to bed. I said that already I had you as a mother, I didn't need to two.'

I smirked, feeling relieved that Ed and I were alone. "How are you feeling." I knew it was a stupid question to ask, considering he was just barfing and most likely has a fever of 104.

He shrugged, sipping the water slowly. 'I could be better.'

He slowly sat up and patted the spot where his head was. I blinked and sat down. After I was seemingly comfortable, Ed put the pillow on my lap and laid back down. His eyes were closed and his cheeks flushed.

I smiled and pushed the hair out of his face. He frowned. He hates it when I play with his hair. He said something about. "feeling like a little girl." I smirked at the thought and rested my hand on his burning forehead. I frowned at the heat.

"What all hurts?" I asked softly.

He kept his eyes closed as he answered. 'Just my stomach. I might have just drank too much coffee or something. You shouldn't worry too much.'

"Shouldn't worry too much?" I repeated in disbelief. "You were just throwing up and it could be my fault!"

He opened his eyes and looked up at. Just the sight of his golden honey eyes made my heart skip a beat. They were just like the sun; beautiful, but dangerous.

'How would it be your fault?' He asked.

"Well, I forgot to remind you to take your medicine. What if this is a side effect of not taking them."

He rolled his eyes, a smirk played at his lips. 'You think of the craziest things when you worry. I'm _fine. _It's just a stomach ache.'

I sighed. What's the point in arguing with him? I knew he would eventually get a new topic to discuss and trick me into talking about that instead. Ed was sneaking when he wanted to be.

"Fine, but I'm still concerned." I stated.

'I wouldn't have it any other way.' He snapped weakly, closing his eyes.

I soothingly ran my finger through his bangs, trying to take away his pain with just a simple touch. I knew I couldn't do that, like he did to me. But he seemed more relaxed. So relaxed that he unconsciously leaned against my hand. But he snapped his head back over once he realized he did it.

I smiled and before I knew it, a soft song drew itself from my lips. It was a slow, sad song that Ed and I both knew very well. We had memorized it long ago. We used to sing it to each other when the other was hurt or scared.

'Mother's song.' Ed mouthed, smiling sadly.

I nodded at him, even though his eyes were closed. Mom always had a sweet melody to sing to us, whatever the occasion. But this song in particular was for pain or fear that we had. When Ed had a nightmare in the middle of the night, practically screaming himself awake, mother was there to coax him back to sleep with that song. When I fell off our tire swing, cutting my knee, Mom kissed it gently and sang the song. It had been something to calm us down and smile once again.

Once Mother died, we didn't smile as much after getting hurt. We didn't sing to each other, mostly because we were afraid of what the other's reaction might be. Ed was scared I was going to cry. I was scared Ed would get mad. So, we didn't sing to each other.

Until one night, when Ed had finally tried it out. It was the day I had a terrible nightmare on a stormy night.

* * *

**Regular P.O.V**

"_Mommy." Al whispered into darkness, shaking visibly in his bed. "Brother. Ed, please."_

_Lightening sliced through night, lighting the room and leaving with a sharp cracking sound of electricity. The power went out an hour ago, leaving Al shaking in his bed. He was scared to get up and crawl into his brother's room. _

"_Brother." Al pleaded softly, curled up with the blankets over his head. "I'm scared. Please, Ed."_

_Thunder boomed suddenly, drawing a loud yelp from the shivering boy. A storm, a blackout, and his previous nightmare all built up, leaving the boy utterly frightened._

"_Alphonse." A sudden voice said from the darkness. _

_The boy in the covers whimpered and pulled the blankets down an inch to look at where the voice came from. _

"_Ed!" Al whimpered, sitting up. Just as he did that, a earsplitting boom sliced the air. Al shrieked, falling back down on the bed, shivering once more._

_The older boy slowly made his way over to his brother's bed. He put his hand on the younger boy's shoulder, which was hidden by blankets. Al peered up at his brother._

"_I'm scared." He whispered. _

_Ed nodded, noticing Al's trembles. He slowly sat on the bed. Al sat up and scooted over more, allowing Ed to lay on the bed. But instead, Ed leaned back on the pillows and held his arms open, as if waiting for a hug._

_Al cuddled into his older brother's arms, feeling secure for the first time that night. Ed reached out and grabbed the blanket, wrapping it around Al's shoulders._

_Even if Al felt safe and warm in Ed's arms, every time there was thunder or lightening, he practically shrieked. Ed felt completely useless. He wasn't the comforting type. Besides, it was a mother's job to calm down her children. And Ed was completely lost._

_Suddenly, Al felt a small hand on his head; fingers twisted in his hair. Just like his mother used to do when he hurt himself. Then, a familiar tone rang through the air. Some of the notes were off, but Al caught the melody almost right away._

"_Mom's song." He whispered softly against his older brother's chest._

_The hand on his head moved to his back, patting gently. This was not what his Mother used to do. This was Ed's own way to calm people down. Al looked up to his brothers face. _

_He was singing softly, looking out the window, as if lost in his thoughts. He took notice to the pair of eyes settled on him and looked back at Alphonse. They stared at each other for a little, the song coming to a halt._

_Al smiled, a genuine smile, and kissed Ed on the nose. "Thank you, Brother."_

_He rested his head back onto Ed's chest. Ed smiled softly and began to sing once more. After two minutes of listen to him sing, Al fell asleep. Ed smiled down at his baby brother, swearing to himself that whenever Al needed help, he would be their Mother's replacement._

_He would be Al's soothing song._

* * *

**Al's P.O.V**

I smiled at the memory. "Do you remember that, Ed?"

Ed opened his eyes. 'Remember what?'

I looked up at the ceiling and began singing the song once more, ignoring the question. Ed relaxed once I ran my finger through his hair. He seemed confused of the question, but some found that it didn't matter. He closed his eyes and sighed through his nose.

It wasn't until I heard soft snores that I finally stopped singing. I knew if Ed didn't have a stomach ache, he probably wouldn't have even laid his head on my lap, much less fall asleep. That's the good thing that happens when Ed is sick. He still acts tough and aloof, but he is weaker, even if he'd never admit it.

When a human is weak, the only thing we can do is rely on other things to toughing back up. Weather that thing be medicine, people, doctors, or food. Although he won't say it out loud, Ed knows that when he is weak, he relies on me to help him. Usually, he just wants me to be the mother and treat him like a child. Which makes sense, considering we both had to grow up at a young age. He relies on silly things like songs and my hand in his hair to help him get stronger. And if that's what he wants me to do, I will gladly do it for him.

I will be the leg Ed stands on.


	15. The Journal

I woke from a reflection of the sun in my eye. Bitterly, I opened my eyes. I was in the living room, my head leaned back on the couch. _Why am I in the living room? _I asked myself. _Oh yeah, Ed was sick._

I looked down, wincing from the cracking sound my neck made. Cracking sounds are never a good thing. That, and my neck was taut, making it painful to move.

"Ed?" I called, once I realized that my older brother was no longer sleeping on my lap.

I stood up, ignoring the muscles in my back that tighten. Damn. I should have never falling asleep in that position. I feel like an old person.

I walked down the hall, searching every room to find Ed. Allen was sleeping in Ed's bed, snoring happily away like Ed wasn't puking last night. I rolled my eyes and kept walking.

Eventually, I found Ed in the bathroom, practically curled around the toilet. His head was resting on his arms, a rag in one hand. No doubt he was going to be sore, especially since he also has healing ribs and muscle pain already.

I sighed and sat beside him. "Ed. Hey, Ed, you need to get up." I said softly, shaking him.

He smacked my hand away tiredly and grumbled mutely. I sighed.

"Come on, Ed. You're going to be sore if you keep sleeping like that." I urged.

He opened his eyes, scowling at the person who woke him up. But once he realized it was me, he just sighed and sat up. As soon as he got in sitting position, he hissed.

I jumped at him and leaned closer. "What's wrong? What hurts?"

By the look on his face, he was obviously in pain. But instead of telling me, he just smiled and waved his hand in a 'don't worry about it' way. I sighed and stood up. He looked up at me, confused, when I stuck out my hand. He took my outstretched hand.

I pulled him up to his feet, noticing the way he staggered. He tried to cover it up by acting like he was looking for something, but I knew he was in pain.

"Go lay down on my bed and I'll make breakfast. I'll wake you up when it is ready. Okay?" I smiled at him.

He nodded, smiling slightly. I let go of his hand and walked out of the bathroom. What Ed didn't know that was that I didn't go to the kitchen. Instead, I hid behind the wall, slightly peeking in. Maybe Ed would give some clues to his pain.

As I expected, he did.

Right when he thought I was gone, his face went from fake happiness to pure agony. He quickly clutched the counter and held his ribs, sweat rolling from his face. He looked up at the mirror and steadied himself. Once he could stand without support, he lifted up his shirt slightly. And what I saw made me nearly gasp out loud.

There was a noticeable black-and-blue bruise over his ribs. It was about two times bigger than my hand, almost as big as my armor's hand. The edges were turning a sickly green color, yet the middle was as black as night. I had to cover my mouth with my hand to remind myself to not gasp.

He sighed and pulled down his shirt once more, looking back in the mirror. He then brushed his teeth, acting as if he didn't have a large welt on his skin.

I turned, still pressing my hand to my mouth. How long has he had that? Here I thought he was getting better, being able to walk steadily and practically run. But I was an idiot; I was careless.

I peeked back into the bathroom, checking to see if he was still okay. But as soon as I looked in, Ed turned to leave. I gasped and ran behind the nearest wall, hiding before he caught me looking. I glanced around the wall. Ed walked into the bedroom and shut the door. I sighed and relaxed.

_I'll ask him about that a little later. _I promised silently as I walked to the kitchen.

* * *

Shortly after I started making pancakes, I heard the door of the kitchen creek open. I smiled and looked back, expecting to see Ed. But my smile quickly fell once I realized it was someone else.

"Good morning." Allen greeted politely, sitting down at the table.

"Morning." I replied. "There is coffee and tea. Take what you want. Cups are in the cabinet beside the coffeemaker."

He stood up and grabbed a cup. I didn't bother looking at what he got. Honestly, I didn't care. I was disappointed that it wasn't Ed that walked into the kitchen. He was probably still sleeping, considering it was only about ten minutes since he went into the bedroom.

There was an uncomfortable silence between Allen and I. We both knew the other didn't have anything to say. But if we didn't start a conversation, things would start to get awkward.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked him over my shoulder, thinking up a good conversation.

He blinked. "Sure."

"What happened to Ed in the war?"

"Why? What do you mean?"

I looked back at the breakfast. "I can always tell when something is bugging Ed. It is obvious that he is trying to hide something. I think it has something to do with the war, but I'm not quite sure. I want to know so I can help him. And I was wondering if you could tell me what happened."

He was silent for a minute, then sighed. "I don't really have the right to tell you that."

"I understand." I said, dropping my shoulders in disappointment.

"But I could give you something that could help you." He quickly stated.

I blinked and looked back at him. "Really? What?"

He held up his finger in a 'wait a minute' way and walked out of the room. When he returned, he had him suitcase. He sat it on the table, careful not to hit his cup, and opened it.

Allen handed me black leather notebook. I looked at it curiously and asked. "What's this?"

"It's Ed's journal. The General gave us all journal to write what's going on in them. This is Ed's. I can't tell what happened because it's personal and I have no right. But you might find something in here."

I blinked, but smiled. "Thank you."

Suddenly, we heard the kitchen door creak open. We stared at each other before quickly looking normal. I hid the journal in the drawer beside the oven and turned around, turning a pancake. Allen threw his suitcase on the ground and sat back in his chair, sipping his coffee/tea.

Ed walked in. His hair was everywhere, proving that he just got up. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. His notebook was at his side, a pen between his fingers. He blinked at us.

"Good morning, Ed." Allen and I said in unison. We blinked at each other, but smiled nevertheless.

Ed raised an eyebrow. He quickly wrote on the notebook. 'Okay, I don't know what you guys are up to, but I'm so tired I don't give a shit. Where's my coffee?'

I smiled. "Grab a cup."

He nodded, throwing his notebook on the table. When he went to grab a cup, he stubbed his toe on the suitcase. He grabbed his toe angrily.

'What the fuck!' He silently yelled. I smiled.

He looked at Allen angrily then pointed to the suitcase. 'What the fuck?'

Allen smiled. "I, uh, was showing Al a picture of my family."

Ed rolled his eyes and grabbed a cup. He poured himself a cup of coffee. Then, he marched over to the table, throwing himself on the chair.

I laughed, turning around. "Breakfast is ready."


End file.
